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alexiiiis09

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alexiiiis09
  • Town/Country : under your bed o.0, somewhere in your closet
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 February 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1529
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About alexiiiis09 : I love FML :) basically my life story right here...

alexiiiis09's last visitors

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alexiiiis09's FML badges

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alexiiiis09's favorite FMLs

Today, I made it my life goal to own a towel heater. FML

#16262012
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8120) - you deserved it (22485)

On 05/20/2011 at 12:43am - misc - by Ahlph -

Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML

#15803109
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9561) - you deserved it (70892)

On 04/16/2011 at 1:14am - misc - by Username - United States (California)

Today, I realized that my boyfriend does not stop by my apartment to give me a kiss between classes. He is actually stopping by between his classes to steal my condoms because he is too cheap to pay for them when he cheats on me. FML

#15740141
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54166) - you deserved it (4055)

On 04/11/2011 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Carmen - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my bird learned to mimic my fire alarm. It proved it to me at 3 am. FML

#15341200
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27450) - you deserved it (4007)

On 03/16/2011 at 8:12pm - animals - by MacGrouber (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I fell down some steps, and my dad laughed at me. He then changed his facebook status to "My kid's an idiot." FML

#14994829
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25249) - you deserved it (5231)

On 02/15/2011 at 9:32pm - misc - by Ihavealisp (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!" in Michael Jackson's voice while having an orgasm. FML

#14820910
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26658) - you deserved it (5598)

On 02/03/2011 at 12:17am - intimacy - by anonymous -

Today, I let my friend borrow my car. She parked it in a towing zone, and it was towed. The best part is, it was towed by a bogus towing company. The cops assure me it's safe in a chop shop somewhere. FML

#14716364
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21399) - you deserved it (3791)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:07am - misc - by pedestrian (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it was my daughter's birthday. She had been wanting a cat for a long time, so I went to the animal shelter and got an orange one. As soon as she saw it, she ran upstairs screaming, "GINGER! GINGER!" She refuses to come downstairs until I get rid of "the soulless creature." FML

#14644616
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28197) - you deserved it (6217)

On 01/19/2011 at 10:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend tried to serenade me with The Sex is Good by Saving Abel. According to him, "I have to fake it, I'd leave if I could. I'm not in love, but the sex is good." FML

#14521815
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22070) - you deserved it (3372)

On 01/09/2011 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

#14413679
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20376) - you deserved it (4435)

On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that every day without fail, the muffins I've been making and giving to my husband for work have been hitting speeding cars' windshields. FML

#14344893
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18593) - you deserved it (3455)

On 12/26/2010 at 10:47am - misc - by muffdriver (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, b*tch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML

#13827261
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11050) - you deserved it (48253)

On 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML

#13536412
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32975) - you deserved it (6301)

On 10/21/2010 at 11:20am - misc - by maddiee. (woman) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, I was traveling by bus. There were no spare seats, so I stood next to a seated lady. When she got off at her stop, I was amused because her bum made the shape of a mushroom on the seat. I went to sit on it. So I'm sitting there when I realise the seat is really warm... and wet. FML

#13417428
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26916) - you deserved it (6940)

On 10/12/2010 at 5:26am - misc - by babydoll (woman) - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, I was watching TV with my grandpa, and he stopped flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote landed on my stomach as my mom and grandma walked in. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML

#13180631
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30260) - you deserved it (3223)

On 09/24/2010 at 6:22am - misc - by Andrew - United States (Indiana)



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