alexiiiis09

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alexiiiis09

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 February 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3939
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About alexiiiis09 : I love FML :) basically my life story right here...

alexiiiis09's page activity

Visits<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 6:38pm<b>countryguy91290</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 12:05am<b>tomtom375</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 11:04pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 11:12pm<b>JazzHandsFML</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 2:59pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 4:27pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 2:18pm<b>recklessryan</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 12:46pm<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 2:41pm<b>AliCat18</b> - the 12/03/2011 at 10:48am<b>perdix</b> - the 09/21/2011 at 6:27am

Fucked!<b>countryguy91290</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 6:05am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 5:12am

alexiiiis09's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

alexiiiis09's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

by Anonymous / 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, an asshat in a Foghorn Leghorn t-shirt let his piece-of-crap mongrel dog do some sort of rain dance on the roof of my car, scratching the paintwork. He was a huge guy, so my backbone left town and I just smiled as if it was cute. FML

by MY CAR / 11/14/2011 at 11:51pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my social-awkwardness is so bad, I was actually proud of myself for managing to ask someone a question. FML

by ish0rty / 11/14/2011 at 3:42am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought weed for the first time. The dealer was an undercover cop. FML

by honeybadger123 / 11/13/2011 at 8:11pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I have two black eyes. The first one I got from the girl whose ass I mistakenly grabbed at a party last night. The other one I got from my girlfriend when I explained the first one. FML

by ThatHurts / 11/13/2011 at 7:11pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

by steve-o / 11/02/2011 at 1:06am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

by HOe HOe HOe / 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML

by Anonymous / 10/31/2011 at 8:36pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend tried to change her pad while we were sitting in a crowded movie theatre. She succeeded and slipped the used pad into her purse. I can't get rid of the memory, and I don't think I can ever eat popcorn again. FML

by ohdear / 10/31/2011 at 11:38am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 11:52am / United States / Kids

Today, while I was at work at a nursing home I was attempting to dress a woman for bed. She popped me a left hook and I had to ask the nurse to look at my jaw. After my nurse said I was okay she asked me to continue getting the woman dressed for bed. She hit me 5 more times. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 1:37am / United States / Work

Today, I convinced my best friend to talk to the guy I like at work to find out if he was interested in me. She came back ten minutes later, and told me he said he'd never be able to date me. Apparently, kissing me "would be like making out with Mother Teresa's corpse." FML

by nekogirl15 / 10/26/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, for my birthday, instead of a cake, my friends surprised me with a castle mainly made out of bacon. I don't want to seem ungrateful, but I fucking hate bacon. FML

by Anonymous / 10/26/2011 at 10:14am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home crying and informed my mother that someone had called me a 'fat bitch' today. She held me at arms length, looked me straight in the eyes, and lovingly said, "You can't change who you are." FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2011 at 12:16pm / Ireland (Meath) / Miscellaneous

Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML

by tommyboy783 / 10/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous