alexangel33

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Offline (the 03/17/2016 at 4:27am)

alexangel33

5Fucked!

alexangel33alexangel33
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 December 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 498
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About alexangel33 : Stuff written here

alexangel33's page activity

Visits<b>Mons</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 6:10pm<b>leigh_xx</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 6:25pm<b>IFrostzz</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 4:48pm<b>flanary733</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 11:57pm<b>aiw14</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:18pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 2:12pm<b>ughlifesuck</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 4:23pm<b>BlueSteele220</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 11:15pm<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 3:42pm<b>tdakota0408</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 8:23am<b>jordanwilbanks</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 7:54am<b>killer0689</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 12:34pm<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 1:45pm<b>FFStepchild283</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 2:27am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 12:33pm<b>BigxXxDeal</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 11:20am<b>shunter54</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 3:46am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 12:07pm

Fucked!<b>flanary733</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 5:32am<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 6:45pm<b>Mons</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 6:18pm<b>shunter54</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 9:04pm

alexangel33's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of alexangel33's badges

alexangel33's favorite FMLs

Today, my 4 year old's heavily pregnant teacher pulled me aside and asked me to talk to my son about "boundaries". Apparently, he asked her if she was going to "boobie feed" him and listed a few reasons why she should and why formula is bad, in front of the entire class. FML

by sammylynnp / 01/07/2016 at 12:39am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend jumped into my arms for a kiss. She's done it before, but this time I wasn't expecting it. I fell backwards, straight through my glass coffee table. FML

by fucking SUCKS let's do it LIIIIIIIVEEEEEEEEE! / 12/10/2015 at 8:45am / United States / Health

Today, it's job interview day. In the elevator on the way there, I overheard potential candidates talking about the boss of the company, mocking his alleged lack of credibility. Who's the boss? Me. They don't know that yet. FML

by Oli974 / 10/22/2015 at 9:08am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Work

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

by well SHIT / 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the arcade with my dad, and we decided to try out the hurricane simulator, which blasts 60mph air around in an enclosed space. My dad farted halfway through. FML

by begging for air / 02/20/2014 at 12:45pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got into a slight spot of shit with my new boss over his speech. Apparently he was not actually impersonating Sylvester the Cat, and he just has a speech impediment. When I jokingly said "sufferin' succotash" to him, he wasn't pleased at all. FML

by Anonymous / 02/10/2014 at 5:37pm / United Kingdom / Work

Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML

by Unknown / 02/07/2014 at 9:18am / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy

Today, I was talking dirty to my long-distance lover while touching myself, when a cockroach fell from my ceiling and landed on the hand I was molesting myself with. FML

by DisgustinglyFrustrated / 10/10/2013 at 11:40am / Argentina (Santa Fe) / Intimacy

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

by SerenityJ / 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 3:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. 20 minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2013 at 6:09pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML

by babs / 05/07/2013 at 3:07pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML

by random / 04/29/2013 at 5:11pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Love