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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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alex_rose_x

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alex_rose_x
  • Town/Country : Auckland, New Zealand
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 March 1993 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 493
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About alex_rose_x : My name's Alex, I'm 16, live in NZ. Life is good (:

Love FML. Keeps me entertained for hours.

alex_rose_x's last visitors

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alex_rose_x's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

alex_rose_x's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that nothing kills a wet dream faster than a kitten who pounces on things that wiggle under the blanket. FML

#5903153 (56)

I agree, your life sucks (13870) - you deserved it (2296)

On 10/19/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by JohnB (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

#5851325 (44)

I agree, your life sucks (13471) - you deserved it (2385)

On 10/16/2009 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by damnit (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was enjoying some "alone time" with the detachable shower head when someone flushed the toilet, causing the cold water to run out and badly scald my genitals. It hurts to walk. FML

#5793265 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (10697) - you deserved it (11959)

On 10/12/2009 at 8:34am - intimacy - by ravestradamus (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend texted me telling me how much he loved me, and that he wanted my virginity. We have already done it. I don't think he meant to send that text to me. FML

#5763126 (45)

I agree, your life sucks (17890) - you deserved it (1347)

On 10/10/2009 at 7:21pm - intimacy - by screwed.over (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was paying for coffee and accidentally touched hands with the girl behind the counter. As I was walking home, I realised that was the closest I've been to getting laid in two years. FML

#5661847 (58)

I agree, your life sucks (14487) - you deserved it (2887)

On 10/05/2009 at 1:22pm - intimacy - by swedishguy (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my fiancé was performing oral on me, when I heard him start making a "Waka waka waka waka" noise. He confessed to pretending to be Pacman. FML

#5629622 (170)

I agree, your life sucks (14889) - you deserved it (3119)

On 10/03/2009 at 9:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their daughter. FML

#5582253 (97)

I agree, your life sucks (6478) - you deserved it (19383)

On 10/01/2009 at 10:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, while I was getting it on with my girlfriend I accidentally called out "Mom" instead of her name. FML

#5579275 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (6408) - you deserved it (24349)

On 10/01/2009 at 1:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, after an amazing sex session, my boyfriend rolls over and stares lovingly into my eyes, puts his hand on my cheek caressing it tenderly... and says "Who's a good piggy?" in his best Homer Simpson's voice. FML

#5562076 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (15679) - you deserved it (3025)

On 09/30/2009 at 4:28am - intimacy - by homersgirl (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I went to a school committee meeting. I sat opposite my boyfriend. To get his attention I began stroking his crotch area with my leg. The principal stood up 5 minutes later pulling me under the table. My tights were caught in his zipper. FML

#5548744 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (4987) - you deserved it (19865)

On 09/29/2009 at 3:45pm - intimacy - by clumssyXO (woman) - Hungary (Veszprem)

Today, my girlfriend was getting up to leave and I, trying to be romantic, got up behind her and tried to swing her back down onto the bed and kiss her simultaneously, misjudged the distance and threw her into the wall, her head then bounced off the wall and into my forehead, spraining her nose. FML

#5394523 (63)

I agree, your life sucks (5656) - you deserved it (13327)

On 09/21/2009 at 3:08pm - intimacy - by dontpanic (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my girlfriend asked if she should get birthcontrol, of course I said yes and offered to pay the 55 dollar fee. She got her physical and pills and then dumped me the next day. I basically paid 55 dollars so that she can sleep with other people. FML

#5392690 (39)

I agree, your life sucks (17068) - you deserved it (2459)

On 09/21/2009 at 12:34pm - intimacy - by charlieday (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing a game where you ask sexual questions and you have to give an honest answer. At one point, I asked my boyfriend what his favorite position is, to which he quickly answered with no hesitation, "Any one where I don't have to see your face or body." FML

#5369665 (68)

I agree, your life sucks (17863) - you deserved it (2588)

On 09/20/2009 at 10:42am - intimacy - by uglyallover (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried to wake my husband up in the middle of the night by kissing him deeply and massaging his neck and shoulders. He opens his eyes, looks at me, says "No", and goes back to sleep. FML

#5306041 (62)

I agree, your life sucks (10575) - you deserved it (8822)

On 09/17/2009 at 12:42am - intimacy - by turnoff (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (19313) - you deserved it (3441)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)