About alexFYL : if you're reading this you're wasting your time. HA HA!
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alexFYL's favorite FMLs
Today, my tonsils swelled to roughly the size of golf balls. My mom refuses to take me to the hospital because she's convinced I got it from kissing someone, and until I "fess up", she's not budging. FML
by Eden / 07/14/2011 at 4:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health
by sbutler / 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by Username / 07/14/2011 at 4:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my friends and I went to the park for some planking. Trying to find a daring spot, I climbed a tree and laid down on a branch. While I was waiting for my friends to take a picture, the branch gave out. FML
by Stephanie / 07/14/2011 at 3:17pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, my neighbour's boiler broke and flooded his home. To solve the problem, the water company shut off the neighbourhood's water supply while they fixed his boiler. I am now unable to shower, and I smell like a zoo animal. FML
by failure / 07/14/2011 at 12:24pm / Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City) / Miscellaneous
Today, at work, a regular started talking to me. Subject of choice? His overwhelming amount of earwax. Apparently he'd like to make a candle out of it once he goes to the doctor to get it removed. FML
by Breanne / 07/14/2011 at 11:25am / Canada (Manitoba) / Work
by alek / 07/14/2011 at 10:17am / United States / Work
Today, my new neighbor informed me with great relish that the house I have just bought is haunted because 30 years ago a man shot himself in the kitchen. I'm now paying a huge mortgage on a house I'm frightened to be alone in. FML
by Boo / 07/14/2011 at 4:59am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
by j1hill33 / 07/14/2011 at 1:09am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I couldn't shut a drawer in my kitchen, because an oven mitt was blocking it. An oven mitt filled with tin-foil wrapped electronics. My Mom believes Internet hackers can get into her digital camera and prepaid cell phone, and apparently tin-foil will prevent that. FML
by BelleCharmante / 07/14/2011 at 12:50am / United States (North Carolina) / Geek
by stephiew / 07/13/2011 at 11:15pm / United States (Georgia) / Health
Today, my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years still refuses to memorize my phone number or remember my birthday because he says there is a limited amount of space in his brain and he does not want to push any important information out. FML
by skidoosh / 07/13/2011 at 9:44pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Love
Today, I'm staying with my mother for a week. Every time I eat something, she tells me that it's "swimsuit season" and that I need to eat less. Every time I say I'm not hungry, she panics and insists I have an eating disorder. I can't win. FML
by argh / 07/13/2011 at 7:49pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by 30Jenna / 07/13/2011 at 6:01pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I awoke to banging at my door. It was my neighbor, accusing me of stealing her mail to spy on her, because apparently she thinks I must be some sort of secret agent. The cops don't believe me when I call, and she won't go away. FML
by MIB / 07/13/2011 at 12:26pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of…