About alex1432 : auto mechanic
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alex1432's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation
by a chick in California / 06/14/2012 at 4:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by halloweed / 11/16/2011 at 12:27am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Sabraynay / 09/28/2011 at 2:47am / Intimacy
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
by FullOfNick / 09/10/2011 at 3:11am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by seriously? / 09/07/2011 at 1:37pm / United States / Work
by Anonymous / 09/01/2011 at 2:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids
Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML
by Username / 08/31/2011 at 3:36am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/30/2011 at 7:24am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy
Today, at my job as a movie theater attendant, my boss finally eased up and let me sit in on one of the movies. One woman kept laughing out loud every other line. After ten minutes of her braying like a dying horse, I got up and had her ejected from the theater. I'm a terrible person. FML
by power corrupts... / 08/07/2011 at 4:29pm / Czech Republic (Plzensky kraj) / Work
Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML
by iannie / 07/31/2011 at 5:45pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
by creepedout / 07/31/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Intimacy
- Today, I took my daughter's cat in for what should have been a routine surgery. He reacted badly to… Today, my girlfriend of one year kept dropping hints about us getting married and having kids soon.… Today the Lord struck me with not only a headache and a weirdly twitchy eye, but also with a cyst…