alaskafornia

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alaskafornia

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 30 August 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 675
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About alaskafornia : ii have noo idea waht to put here.. Umm Hi! Im Kalli. *High Five* ii dont even kno.
Ii usually have noo life, yes tht did make sense =) and iim random and bored a lot. Soo yea. Message me iif uu want too!

alaskafornia's page activity

Visits<b>lmc94</b> - the 11/13/2011 at 12:40am<b>CasualZombie</b> - the 09/17/2011 at 3:51am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:18pm<b>munzapoppa</b> - the 07/26/2011 at 2:36am<b>oxoashleeoxo</b> - the 07/13/2011 at 6:56pm<b>crona</b> - the 07/08/2011 at 11:47pm<b>dman4412</b> - the 07/06/2011 at 7:49pm<b>Riiley</b> - the 06/30/2011 at 5:49pm<b>LemonStarship</b> - the 06/19/2011 at 12:10am<b>Egnar</b> - the 06/10/2011 at 8:07pm

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Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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alaskafornia's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought a lanyard for my new car keys. "Epic Fail" was printed on it. Not two hours after getting it and putting my keys on it, I locked them in my car. I don't have a spare. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2011 at 12:18am / United States / Transportation

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

by Bigpoppa0507 / 08/31/2011 at 10:02am / Canada / Health

Today, my friend's dad had a heart attack. Without realizing what I was saying, I texted her, "If you need anything, you know I'll be there in a heartbeat." FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2011 at 12:18am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to talk to my boyfriend about our communication problems. He fell asleep. FML

by Ella / 07/05/2011 at 7:48am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, it has been 8 months since I started a photography project in which I would take a picture of the same tree every day for a year. I just heard a noise outside. They cut the tree down. FML

by A girl / 06/27/2011 at 3:55am / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Work

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

by kaplwv116 / 06/26/2011 at 9:08pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML

by ugly / 06/26/2011 at 3:02am / United States / Kids

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I went to a party and we all decided to play hide-and-go-seek despite our ages. I started counting. When I was done, I started searching and after 5 minutes of searching, I found that everyone left me. FML

Today, while driving with my family, the car got stuck in a large patch of mud. My family of seven decided that I, the fifteen year old girl, would be best suited to push it out. After slipping, falling, and getting completely covered in mud, they finally called a tow truck. FML

by muddygal / 06/25/2011 at 3:10pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Transportation

Today, it was my first day at my new job. My new boss asked me if I was single. After telling him I have been happily married for 6 years, he fired me on the spot. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2011 at 1:35am / United States (Idaho) / Work

Today, my son's homework was to write a story about what he wants to be when he grows up. He wrote that he plans on being unemployed and living at home until we throw him out, then he'll live under a bridge. He's only 12, but already planning for a future as an unemployed bum. FML

by Seriously / 06/15/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

by notinthebutt / 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Money

Today, I made a fresh juice for a customer. He called the cops because the juice was too acidic for him. He sat in a corner and waited for two hours for them to arrive. Obviously, they didn't turn up. So he yelled at me and left. FML

by Alice / 05/27/2011 at 1:46am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I used the same credit card to apply to college and pay for a rave ticket. My card went through on the rave ticket but denied the college application fee. I guess my credit card is trying to tell me something about my future. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2009 at 2:23am / United States / Money