About alaska1243 : I am in college studying health information technology. I like to look at this site a lot.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML
I agree, your life sucks (36827) - you deserved it (2804)
On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a text from an unknown number saying, "You shouldn't be eating that." I was eating a piece of chocolate, cheating on my diet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25535) - you deserved it (15159)
On 01/27/2013 at 12:38am - misc - by LucidNightmare - United States (Colorado)
Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19109) - you deserved it (1930)
On 10/26/2012 at 1:58pm - intimacy - by fiftyshardsofbroccoli (woman) - United States
Today, my dad was teaching me how to drive. He told me that stop signs with white outlines are "optional." I ran through the next one I saw and got pulled over by a cop. My dad is making me pay the ticket for being "that stupid." Thanks dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8036) - you deserved it (24392)
On 10/23/2012 at 9:19am - money - by Dinger1992 - United States
Today, at breakfast, my sister labelled me a "feminist." My whole family now refuses to talk to me for more than 30 seconds, and acts as though I have an incurable, highly contagious disease. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13034) - you deserved it (3120)
On 10/23/2012 at 4:21am - kids - by hating labels - Australia
Today, a parent was too busy texting to notice her child had run in front of a moving truck. She did however see me grab the child's backpack to yank him back out of traffic. She then screamed at me for "manhandling" her child and demanded I be fired. It's not even my school; I'm a part time sub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22812) - you deserved it (952)
On 10/22/2012 at 11:51pm - work - by bad samaritan (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I saw my music teacher, who I considered one of my role-models, on TV. Too bad it was because she'd robbed a church. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13234) - you deserved it (1020)
On 10/22/2012 at 6:51pm - misc - by musicthief - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I let a friend borrow a power saw. When I found it on my porch later, the blade was missing and the cord was cut. Looking closer, I realized it was his saw. He kept my new one. He totally denies that he switched them and now won't answer his door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14878) - you deserved it (1133)
On 10/22/2012 at 6:34pm - misc - by petra84 - United States (Colorado)
Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20930) - you deserved it (4129)
On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22260) - you deserved it (3161)
On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while at a psychiatric hospital working as a student nurse, I discovered one of the patients had developed an unhealthy obsession for me. He was admitted for stalking and abusing a girl who looked just like me. It's only my first week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17648) - you deserved it (993)
On 10/22/2012 at 6:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I had to pry my sister's used tampon out from between my dog's jaws. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19202) - you deserved it (1132)
On 10/06/2012 at 6:58pm - animals - by banj0 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I had to pry my sister's used tampon out from between my dog's jaws. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19202) - you deserved it (1132)
On 10/06/2012 at 6:58pm - animals - by banj0 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19961) - you deserved it (4783)
On 08/29/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16497) - you deserved it (7562)
On 07/11/2012 at 1:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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