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ajk47

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ajk47

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  • Number of visits : 167
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ajk47's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 11:42am

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ajk47's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

#20941049
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86463) - you deserved it (6186)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulled up and asked if I wanted to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. FML

#20622653
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41653) - you deserved it (8899)

On 04/26/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by KingUrge (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

#20603007
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51427) - you deserved it (5953)

On 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick". One more year. FML

#20581667
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63691) - you deserved it (3051)

On 04/09/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML

#20575072
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41212) - you deserved it (3733)

On 04/04/2013 at 6:52pm - kids - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my brother yelled at me, calling me a "no-good fucking whore", because I couldn't fix his laptop. The same laptop he threw on the floor after screaming "FUCKING HEAL MEEE!" at his game. As ever, my parents took his side, refusing to believe that I can't fix a cracked monitor. FML

#20539298
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38604) - you deserved it (2380)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by cunts, cunts everywhere - Australia

Today, I confronted my 18-year-old daughter about her excessively lengthy showers. She said she didn't see the big deal, considering the water "comes free with the house." No dear, it doesn't. FML

#20414355
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35180) - you deserved it (5548)

On 12/22/2012 at 6:29pm - kids - by Jane (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was with my boyfriend and we were talking about childhood memories. He told me about a girl he made fun of in middle school. That was me. FML

#18479280
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36572) - you deserved it (3499)

On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my best friend threw my football over a wall, so we hopped over to go and get it. Next thing we know, we're both surrounded by men pointing guns in our faces. FML

#18127169
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32646) - you deserved it (6512)

On 11/01/2011 at 5:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I learned no matter how much your friends pressure you, you must never snort lines of curry powder. FML

Today, I was looking in my grandparents' drawers and cupboards to find a blanket, but instead found a stash of sex toys, and a male G-string with a horse on the front. The best bit? When you press the horse's nose, it neighs. FML

#15703960
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38133) - you deserved it (9058)

On 04/09/2011 at 1:46am - intimacy - by fuundmental/// - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was going down on my girlfriend. I thought everything was going well, then all of a sudden she gets up and screams at me "IT'S NOT A TACO EATING COMPETITION, CHILL OUT." FML

#15087841
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21428) - you deserved it (41753)

On 02/23/2011 at 5:06am - intimacy - by failed (man) - Switzerland (Vaud)

Today, I started my first day at a new hospital. My first assignment? Shave an elderly man's testicles. FML

#13333152
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35423) - you deserved it (5038)

On 10/05/2010 at 7:36pm - work - by hospital - United States (New York)

Today, I was crying because my cat died. My boyfriend cupped my face in his hands, looked me straight into the eyes and said, "I love seeing you cry." FML

#8969513
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33621) - you deserved it (3197)

On 03/10/2010 at 11:08am - love - by sliceddice (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)

Today, I found out my grandpa died. As I rushed home crying to comfort my parents, I got pulled over for speeding. The officer told me to cut out the "fake" tears". When I told him my grandpa just died he tacked on another $100 for lying to an officer. Worst. Christmas. Ever. FML

#6926998
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43028) - you deserved it (2981)

On 12/24/2009 at 7:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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