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ajeppsen

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ajeppsen
  • Town/Country : Utah, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3538
  • Number of comments : 179
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About ajeppsen : You're probably visiting me because I pissed you off, I'm sorry. Or maybe because I made a kickass comment, stay tuned for more to come! EIther way your visiting my profile and that makes me happy, I don't get a lot of company, it is lonely here. Message me? I'll respond!

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ajeppsen's favorite FMLs

Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML

#20776976
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41928) - you deserved it (3747)

On 07/12/2013 at 12:36am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask my crush to a movie. What I didn't realise is that she would bring a "friend" along, and that I would have to sit next to them making out for 2 hours. FML

#20772026
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49148) - you deserved it (3755)

On 07/09/2013 at 7:05am - love - by thirdwheel - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my 7-year-old sister had a nightmare, so I let her sleep in my bed. I woke up to her punching me in the face and giving me a black eye. Apparently, she not only screams when she's having a nightmare, she also "gives the bad guy a taste of his own medicine." FML

#20759842
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42595) - you deserved it (4141)

On 07/02/2013 at 1:39pm - health - by good big sister? (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

#20759121
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46646) - you deserved it (11247)

On 07/02/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by yeshehaspornaddiction (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my girlfriend kicked me out for bringing up the idea of her maybe giving me a blowjob someday. According to her, it's "demeaning" and "sick". She doesn't seem to have a problem always making me go down on her for ages as a condition for having sex with me, though. FML

#20754518
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51799) - you deserved it (8369)

On 06/29/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by patriarchal apparently (man) - Saint Lucia

Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML

#20750126
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48512) - you deserved it (3243)

On 06/27/2013 at 11:17am - misc - by Guntherdog - United States

Today, I went out on a date with a girl. Everything was going well until I shared how my family was affected by the 2010 earthquake in Haiti. She immediately got up and left, calling me a liar. Apparently, I'm "too cute" to be of Haitian descent. What the hell? FML

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML

#20747044
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36394) - you deserved it (4258)

On 06/25/2013 at 7:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while life-guarding in a 55+ community, I greeted a man by saying: "Good morning Sir!" He responded with, "Cut the shit kid, I'm not that fucking old." FML

#20746882
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36594) - you deserved it (5198)

On 06/25/2013 at 5:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML

#20746764
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33102) - you deserved it (2793)

On 06/25/2013 at 4:43pm - misc - by mymomplucksbutthair (woman) - United States

Today, while walking around town, some guy grabbed me from behind, clutched at my nipples, and said, "That's where I always imagined they were." FML

#20746398
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48614) - you deserved it (3681)

On 06/25/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my family. They didn't even notice me there until the dog started barking at me because I took his spot. My mom defended the dog, and now I'm sitting on the floor while a Pomeranian takes up half the couch for himself. FML

Today, my daughter's obsession with Canada got out way of hand when she was suspended for climbing up the flagpole, in an attempt to replace the flag with a red-and-white maple leaf one. FML

Today, I took my girlfriend of nearly 2 years out to dinner so I could propose. When the waiter brought the check, I caused a bit of a scene to get everyone's attention. When I got on my knee and proposed, she said no and asked if I could hurry up and pay, because she was embarrassed. FML

#20744819
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52363) - you deserved it (14224)

On 06/24/2013 at 4:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was feeding some ducks. One of them choked to death on the old bread. FML

#20744476
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45229) - you deserved it (12833)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - Belgium



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