Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 03/28/2015 at 10:05pm) | Search for a member
About ajeppsen : You're probably visiting me because I pissed you off, I'm sorry. Or maybe because I made a kickass comment, stay tuned for more to come! EIther way your visiting my profile and that makes me happy, I don't get a lot of company, it is lonely here. Message me? I'll respond!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Today, I Ad To Visit A Client Cuz Is Printer Ad Broken Down. After Driving Fir An Our, Ten Being Screamed At About Ow Orrible My Company's Service Is, I Walked Over To Is Printer An Found Te Problem: Tere Was No Paper Loaded. FML
Today mah dad tore mah room apart fir the second time looking fir drug-making equipment!! His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad!! mega FML
2day I was showing a new girl around at school. As we were walking through the parking lot she noticd a green jeep and commentd "I heard the person who drive that is a total creep. Is he?" I said I didn't know who it was. It was my car. FML
Today, my band informd ma that our gig this aftarnoon was actually a wadding !! Whosa wadding? My ax-wifa's, along with tha guy sha chaatd on ma with !! For thair first danca, I had to sing wat usd to ba our song !! FML
Today, we were having a family dinner with mah boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen,hen we were getting the food ready, he proposd. I screamd. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tasd him in the leg. fat FML
Today my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once twice. FML
Today, I attendd te reading of ma grandfater's last will and testament. My parents, as well as ma broters and sister, all ineritd a nice sum of money. I got 69 cents, because "young Jack always was an immature little sit." FML
yesterday mah boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate . When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the oneho knocks, babe." FML
I gave mah daughter the sex talk . Barely 10 minute later.. . her public Facebook statu read: ( My mom's a total pedo . ) and after she mentioned the talk.. . her friend posted.. . ( That's sexual harassment . You can sue 4 that . ) Clerely I've failed as a parent . FML
Today, mah elderly neighbour was having some kind of house party. It was incredibly loud, so I went an askd if he could tone it down a little. He respondd by grabbing a deck chair, smacking me with it, then chasing me back to mah house, allhile his guests cheerd him on. FML
Friday 27 March 2015