About ainsleyr : Live. Love. Laugh.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
I NEED to know!
You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27825) - you deserved it (4478)
On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49819) - you deserved it (5252)
On 08/21/2011 at 5:59am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boss stopped mid-walk during a conversation about the humidity in our office, after I told him I didn't like the air conditioner on, because I'd rather not be cold and wet, and that I liked it warm and sticky. I knew then he was no longer thinking about the AC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9162) - you deserved it (22899)
On 08/17/2011 at 9:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was caught and fined for picking a lock. I have OCD. I was picking the padlock on a toilet paper holder in a public toilet because the roll was the wrong way round. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26255) - you deserved it (10458)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by Anon - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend poops with "This is war" playing on his phone, and makes war sounds corresponding with his poop dropping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23369) - you deserved it (3158)
On 07/23/2011 at 3:49am - love - by MaHalKiTa (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41335) - you deserved it (6110)
On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23275) - you deserved it (1920)
On 07/20/2011 at 6:17pm - misc - by cheddar (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my family is on the third day of driving cross country. My husband is still pretending he is driving on a NASCAR track, sound effects and all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18455) - you deserved it (2956)
On 07/20/2011 at 4:18pm - misc - by Stacy Dee - United States
Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31111) - you deserved it (8242)
On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)
I agree, your life sucks (26815) - you deserved it (3030)
On 07/20/2011 at 12:37pm - kids - by Taylor - United States (Texas)
Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37161) - you deserved it (2676)
On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)
Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12196) - you deserved it (31252)
On 07/20/2011 at 8:36am - misc - by ElixirRose - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33011) - you deserved it (4819)
On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my neighbor finally cut the grass on his front lawn. At 2 in the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24427) - you deserved it (2621)
Today, I got a call from a man yelling and cursing at me, calling me a "selfish no-life asshole" for getting his "baby girl" pregnant. I'm 29 and she is 27 and we have been married for 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40295) - you deserved it (2056)
On 07/20/2011 at 3:40am - kids - by Harry - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
