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aglick

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  • Number of visits : 758
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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aglick's page activity

Visits<b>rebeccagibson888</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 12:12am

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aglick's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML

#20440419
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33083) - you deserved it (2984)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:35am - misc - by Dimples (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

#20437796
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37838) - you deserved it (4009)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:07am - animals - by catdog - United States (California)

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML

#20435818
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40341) - you deserved it (13561)

On 01/01/2013 at 5:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML

#20200046
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30065) - you deserved it (2902)

On 12/11/2012 at 2:15am - kids - by n1a1t1h1a1n1 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

#20192329
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21596) - you deserved it (3716)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

#20083631
358 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20947) - you deserved it (8839)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm - kids - by SadDad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

#20052962
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19363) - you deserved it (47059)

On 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by WhyAppleWhy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that two kids were able to, without much effort, convince my 16-year-old daughter that her friend's house was used to smuggle out Jews during WWII. His house was built in 2007. We also live in America. FML

#20033419
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23487) - you deserved it (2940)

On 08/21/2012 at 4:21am - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United States

Today, while I was getting intimate with my husband, he moaned someone else's name. He actually tried to explain himself by saying that he'd had a "divine encounter," and while "possessed by the Lord," he'd been told the name of our future daughter. FML

#20003981
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35412) - you deserved it (2572)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by lils (woman) - United States

Today, I was teaching my daughter how to ride a bike with no training wheels. After comforting her and assuring her that she'd be fine, I gave her a big push. She fell forward over the handlebars and scraped her chin on the front wheel. FML

#20002371
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8880) - you deserved it (22278)

On 08/04/2012 at 3:14pm - kids - by me - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

#19592298
373 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30347) - you deserved it (3075)

On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
583 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13723) - you deserved it (55277) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML

#19260934
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21880) - you deserved it (3294)

On 03/11/2012 at 11:04pm - animals - by weep weep weep (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

#19222956
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25275) - you deserved it (7726)

On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States

Today, I installed an alarm app on my phone. Turns out, to unlock the phone and get the ringing to stop, I have to answer a maths question. It took me ten minutes to get it right. FML

#19203971
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10917) - you deserved it (29223)

On 03/02/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by Ashleigh - Australia



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