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afdude87

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afdude87
  • Town/Country : from California, live in Alaska., US, US, US, US, US
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 December 1987 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 5788
  • Number of comments : 392
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About afdude87 : hey

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afdude87's favorite FMLs

Today, my son was on Facebook while he was supposed to be studying. He called me a liar and accused me of making up excuses to chew him out. How do I know he was online? He liked and commented on a video I posted. My son is a dumbass. FML

#15398872
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44836) - you deserved it (8003)

On 03/20/2011 at 12:10pm - kids - by parenting_failure (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, at the age of 16, I'm recovering from hip surgery. My friends took me out to the movies to cheer me up. They thought it would be hilarious to steal my crutches and leave me stranded and alone in the mall, multiple times. It wasn't. FML

#15398153
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36940) - you deserved it (3384)

On 03/20/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by crutchy (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I dragged my son along with me to a work party because I didn't want him home by himself. Halfway through, he stood up and made an announcement about my pregnancy. I had to explain to all my coworkers and my boss that I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat. FML

#15392529
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29150) - you deserved it (8845)

On 03/20/2011 at 12:26am - kids - by embarassed - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got my first kiss. He had an allergic reaction to my chapstick, and broke out in hives. FML

#15391522
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37046) - you deserved it (4385)

On 03/19/2011 at 11:30pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML

#15352953
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23733) - you deserved it (6139)

On 03/17/2011 at 2:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML

#15345509
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30021) - you deserved it (4577)

On 03/17/2011 at 12:04am - kids - by Username -

Today, I thought I'd take my little sister to the park. After getting bored of playing on the climbers, she thought it would be funny to throw some mud at me; too bad mud wasn’t the only chunky brown stuff on the ground. FML

#15341897
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25656) - you deserved it (3221)

On 03/16/2011 at 8:50pm - kids - by Abeille (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my bird learned to mimic my fire alarm. It proved it to me at 3 am. FML

#15341200
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27449) - you deserved it (4007)

On 03/16/2011 at 8:12pm - animals - by MacGrouber (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39949) - you deserved it (10763)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML

#15334821
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14612) - you deserved it (45267)

On 03/16/2011 at 9:01am - work - by Almostfunny (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I banged into a glass door. My friend laughed at me, so I turned around and gave him the finger, then turned back to continue walking and banged into the door again. FML

#15319937
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12316) - you deserved it (47558)

On 03/15/2011 at 8:37am - misc - by sylverster - Singapore

Today, my husband bought a horse. We don't own any furniture, but we have a flippin' horse. FML

#15317842
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48011) - you deserved it (6233)

On 03/15/2011 at 2:01am - money - by neverthefirst -

Today, I spent almost two hours cleaning my fish tank, only to find out that my cat had secretly eaten all of my fish while I was cleaning the tank. FML

#15309054
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31289) - you deserved it (7325)

On 03/14/2011 at 3:52pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, eating my weight in breadsticks at Olive Garden and trying to relive my childhood via a pogo stick was not a good combination. My new shoes are now a different color. FML

#15297334
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5958) - you deserved it (30670)

On 03/13/2011 at 8:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML

#15296176
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10498) - you deserved it (53720)

On 03/13/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)



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