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Today, I witnessed two women in a catfight, ripping clothes off each other. This would have been great if the two women weren't my mom and my grandma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33219) - you deserved it (3031)
On 04/25/2011 at 9:07am - misc - by Danny -
Today, I had to climb over a tall gate. Getting to the top wasn't a problem, but falling face first on the way down wasn't what I'd had in mind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17800) - you deserved it (7542)
On 04/23/2011 at 5:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I found out the hard way that I'm the "lucky" type of woman who can experience intense orgasms in certain positions: in the middle of group yoga. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36045) - you deserved it (5439)
On 04/23/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by nightDREAMERms (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25227) - you deserved it (3280)
On 04/23/2011 at 9:11am - health - by cdn_steed - United States (New York)
Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After calling her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19700) - you deserved it (2777)
On 04/23/2011 at 1:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19673) - you deserved it (39431)
On 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, it's been 5 years I've been working for a man that won't admit he has Tourette's. He sits at his desk, twitching his head and hissing like a snake. He's also randomly said things like 'nipples', 'Jessica Simpson', 'potato peeler', etc. I feel like it's become my job to warn new employees. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23927) - you deserved it (3219)
On 04/20/2011 at 11:25am - work - by ShakeRattleHiss (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, at work, I spent half an hour trying to convince an elderly customer that no, I wasn't a messenger sent by the devil to take her soul to hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27617) - you deserved it (2439)
On 04/20/2011 at 10:15am - work - by rawr -
Today, my manager told me to throw out some of the old toys at the daycare we work at. I can't because I've seen Toy Story 3, and thinking about them in a dump makes me cry. I'm 28. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27263) - you deserved it (12351)
On 04/19/2011 at 10:29pm - work - by Stupid (woman) - United States
Today, my cat took a shit in my toaster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42868) - you deserved it (6323)
On 04/19/2011 at 10:21pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32601) - you deserved it (4966)
On 04/16/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Worried (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (37822) - you deserved it (5076)
On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (21450) - you deserved it (24175)
On 04/01/2011 at 12:32am - love - by Anonymous - United States
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30164) - you deserved it (24879)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, my dog had to choose between protecting me from a mugger or eating an apple. He chose the apple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29148) - you deserved it (3365)
On 03/20/2011 at 4:29pm - animals - by mugged (man) - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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