Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

afdude87

Search for a member

afdude87

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 December 1987 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6883
  • Number of comments : 392
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About afdude87 : hey

afdude87's page activity

Visits<b>Attalia</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 8:35am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 3:30am<b>Rebekahxxx</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 8:51pm<b>luckygirl2522</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 5:38pm<b>MNV_</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 12:08pm<b>ODST_Panda</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 5:36pm<b>Hikarishimizu</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 11:31pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 9:30pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 9:03pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 8:29pm<b>SandyBella</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 7:36am<b>alexishbu</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 5:10pm<b>whiteangel361</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 7:05am<b>AE101</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 10:32pm<b>Fushionha</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 5:57am<b>delhh</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 4:53am<b>renae_nae95</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 5:29pm<b>19Hahaha11</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 2:44pm

afdude87's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of afdude87's badges

afdude87's favorite FMLs

Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local park when a cop caught us. I had to give him our information and hold a conversation with "Fire and Ice" lubricant on my penis. FML

#16724592
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14628) - you deserved it (52927)

On 06/18/2011 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Khrixas_069 - United States (California)

Today, I had a sore throat, and I'd read that drops of Tabasco sauce on your tongue helps. I aimed the bottle at my tongue and the whole cap came off, covering my face and filling my mouth with Tabasco sauce, causing me to blow chunks all over the kitchen floor. FML

#16673731
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15360) - you deserved it (33550)

On 06/15/2011 at 5:02am - health - by Alec - United States

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

#16576766
335 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37552) - you deserved it (16323)

On 06/09/2011 at 11:04am - health - by wtf - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, my boss asked if he could pay me in guns. FML

#16571694
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30592) - you deserved it (5521)

On 06/09/2011 at 12:06am - work - by grant b - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom looked through my browser history and saw Chatroulette. She thought I'd gotten into online gambling, and wouldn't believe me when I explained what it really was. After I insisted on showing her, the first chat window to open contained cocks as far as the eye could see. FML

#16488839
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21596) - you deserved it (38005)

On 06/03/2011 at 8:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had an orgasm for the first time in almost 3 months. My husband was beaming, saying he had given it his all and was ecstatic that he had finally satisfied me. But to be honest, I'd remembered we had a bag of potato chips in the kitchen. FML

#16466460
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32165) - you deserved it (14465)

On 06/02/2011 at 10:49am - intimacy - by satisfied88 -

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55557) - you deserved it (4264)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

#16410366
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16653) - you deserved it (77086)

On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML

#16383481
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15319) - you deserved it (57016)

On 05/28/2011 at 5:24am - intimacy - by redhanded (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 3-year-long dry spell was about to end. A lovely lady over for dinner, good food, wine and lots of laughs. Things heated up nicely in the bedroom when a playful wrestle made my bed shift, snapping two of its legs. The bed collapsed, totally ruining the mood. The dry spell continues. FML

#16310118
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37678) - you deserved it (5717)

On 05/23/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Badaboom (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36935) - you deserved it (6057)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36935) - you deserved it (6057)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32922) - you deserved it (20253)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32922) - you deserved it (20253)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11298) - you deserved it (63424)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: