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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 December 1987 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10352
  • Number of comments : 392
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About afdude87 : hey

afdude87's page activity

Visits<b>2simz</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 10:31pm<b>SamanthaB243</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 7:10pm<b>jerry08157</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 3:27pm<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 9:59pm<b>Fed21</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 2:39pm<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 12:47pm<b>arealsexybitch</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 6:14pm<b>porkchops21</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 4:41am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 10:20am<b>kingdrop</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 1:17am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 10:07am<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 9:28pm<b>heroqucas</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 4:52am<b>teacupofsunshine</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 12:47am<b>LaurenSullivan</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 9:08am<b>fk18</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 9:44pm<b>AlyKinks35</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 6:53am<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 10:37am

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 4:20pm<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 4:37pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:12pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 4:47am

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afdude87's favorite FMLs

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML

by nomorebeard / 03/25/2009 at 10:13am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

by Stacy / 03/20/2009 at 8:43pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

by KAAALIS / 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML

by sheyo / 03/04/2009 at 8:13pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

by textfail / 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the doctor with my parents. When the doctor asked if I was sexually active, I said 'Yes.' My mom laughed and said 'Good one.' My dad, for added effect said, 'Your hand doesn't count.' FML

by Nails / 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy