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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11903) - you deserved it (3389)
On 02/14/2010 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by klsdhjla (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a call from the guy I'd been seeing for a few weeks. It was his wife calling to find out what was going on with us. He told me he was separated. He left his kids home alone to hook up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18523) - you deserved it (3186)
On 01/09/2010 at 11:07am - love - by notahomewrecker - United States
Today, I was at my 10 year high school reunion. I saw the girl I used to have a BIG crush on, so I decided to go over and say hi. She screams when she sees me. Then, she starts hitting me, looking panicked. I control her and ask why she's hitting me. She says 'Everyone thought you were dead!' FML
I agree, your life sucks (26699) - you deserved it (1431)
On 12/14/2009 at 4:21pm - misc - by Ghost (man) - United States
Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML
I agree, your life sucks (653) - you deserved it (278720)
On 08/06/2009 at 9:35am - misc - by who_could_it_be - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31589) - you deserved it (473812)
On 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm - misc - by I_Am_The_Edge (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24333) - you deserved it (224109)
On 06/07/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16789) - you deserved it (287145)
On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to be a diplomat, I slowly say "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43451) - you deserved it (361046)
On 03/26/2009 at 3:19am - misc - by Tourist (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (48719) - you deserved it (274138)
On 02/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by Noname - United States (Michigan)
Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML
I agree, your life sucks (538164) - you deserved it (47592)
On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)
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