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adultchild

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adultchild
  • Town/Country : maple syrup, pancakes
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1377
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About adultchild : Hey I am just a normal gal that likes to read daily mishaps of people to cheer myself up or when I am bored. You are not going to find anything else about me in here so move along

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adultchild's favorite FMLs

Today, I got on an elevator at the mall, along with a twelve or thirteen-year-old girl talking on her cell. She spent the whole ride telling the person on the other end how hideous I looked and how I look like a pregnant sperm whale. I was too humiliated to even say anything. FML

#20001108
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24479) - you deserved it (3803)

On 08/03/2012 at 9:52pm - kids - by pimpslaprequired (man) - United States

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

#19908748
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26452) - you deserved it (2872)

On 07/08/2012 at 7:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML

#19893089
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17087) - you deserved it (1878)

On 07/05/2012 at 12:01am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom called to chew me out for having my sister arrested. My sister broke into my apartment, rearranged my living room, and claimed she now lived with me. She then threatened me with a butcher's knife for not appreciating what she had done. My mom wants me to pay the bail. FML

#19884123
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31548) - you deserved it (2082)

On 07/03/2012 at 1:36am - misc - by needmorelocks - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

#19877341
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25805) - you deserved it (3485)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML

#19853793
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5746) - you deserved it (22903)

On 06/27/2012 at 12:39am - misc - by deli Shoppe - United States (California)

Today, I got into a huge fight with a girl at school. My mom and dad decided to punish me by letting my three older brothers pick out my wardrobe for the next week. FML

#19812569
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20489) - you deserved it (14149)

On 06/19/2012 at 12:38pm - misc - by Shelby - United States (Illinois)

Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML

#19761318
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8538) - you deserved it (23773)

On 06/09/2012 at 5:15pm - misc - by cock sauce (man) - Switzerland (Luzern)

Today, my friends were coming to pick me up from volleyball practice. When their car pulled up, I jumped in. It was really quiet, so I looked up, only to find I had gotten in the wrong car. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML

#19580511
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27486) - you deserved it (3262)

On 05/06/2012 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Kwalker3 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend cuffed my legs to the bed. After the sex we discovered one of the cuffs wouldn't open. After an hour of trying to pry them open, I had to waddle with him to the fire station to have them removed in front of 4 amused firefighters. FML

#19576314
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15523) - you deserved it (5635)

On 05/05/2012 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML

#19568801
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33299) - you deserved it (9692)

On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States

Today, I found out that of the three medications I am taking for depression, one causes weight gain, one causes severe weight gain, and one "might cause weight gain." FML

#19545026
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23995) - you deserved it (2681)

On 04/28/2012 at 11:00pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents went out of town and I was home all alone. I put up party decorations such as streamers, balloons and confetti. Then, I drank out of red cups, crushed them up and put them all over the house. I didn't have a party, I just wanted to convince my family that I'm not a loser. FML

#19522939
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18681) - you deserved it (12783)

On 04/24/2012 at 5:28pm - misc - by Jaclk - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23749) - you deserved it (10141)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)



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