About acomlapse : Today, I read FML for 12 hours straight. FML
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acomlapse's favorite FMLs
by tylah / 06/23/2012 at 11:11am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/23/2012 at 10:59am / Ireland (Cork) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/23/2012 at 10:23am / Canada / Love
Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML
by Anonymous / 06/23/2012 at 9:11am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by blah56 / 06/23/2012 at 1:17am / United States (Kentucky) / Love
by Coffee Boy / 06/23/2012 at 12:55am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by GM38 / 06/22/2012 at 10:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love
by Uncomfy / 06/22/2012 at 7:01pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
Today, I met my biological parents for the first time. Their justification for giving me up for adoption was that I wasn't conceived at the ideal time for them. Apparently, the ideal time was six months after the adoption, when they conceived the first of my two brothers. FML
by pon-3 / 06/22/2012 at 5:13pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Kids
by hakura madada / 06/22/2012 at 3:41pm / Japan (Tokyo) / Miscellaneous
by lynn / 06/22/2012 at 12:14pm / Australia (Queensland) / Work
Today, I went on a long flight. I was fortunate enough to sit next to a great girl. However, she must have thought I was not so great, because she moved to the empty seat across the aisle. Next to my dad. Who then told stories about how I always get motion sickness on airplanes. I then threw up. FML
by Anonymous / 06/22/2012 at 10:11am / United States / Transportation
Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML
by ExplosiveDildo / 06/22/2012 at 9:08am / Afghanistan / Geek
Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML
by a stupid jackass / 06/21/2012 at 9:28pm / United States (New York) / Love
by anonymous / 06/16/2012 at 9:57am / United States / Love
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…