abrookec2011

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abrookec2011

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1345
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About abrookec2011 : That's my dog and I.

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abrookec2011's page activity

Visits<b>luckygirl2522</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 1:51am<b>dkelly_6</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 3:59pm<b>C001Gir1</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 3:14pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 5:38pm<b>CinematicKid</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 3:15pm<b>whitelightning19</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 5:24pm<b>Bweav1</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 6:59pm<b>groovy579</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 9:45pm<b>dsw144</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 11:40am<b>Laconic01</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 8:05am<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 7:07pm<b>Ins0mau</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 10:12pm<b>miketopgunmike1</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 2:40am<b>ZombieGuyCXV</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 7:15am<b>DuckOnQuack93</b> - the 05/09/2013 at 12:13am<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 11:14am<b>kenzzaayy</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 10:19am<b>muzicizlife2012</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 11:42pm

abrookec2011's FML badges

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abrookec2011's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to stand next to my wife at the supermarket, beet-red and pretending not to exist; about half an hour into our shopping, she completely lost her shit at the advertising on the loudspeaker, turned to another patron, and screamed into his face to shut the fuck up. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2012 at 2:47pm / Ireland / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife and I decided to try role-playing. I started cleaning the pool. waiting for her to come out and be sexy, but she never did. I'd cleaned the entire pool before going into the house to ask why she never came out. She said she tricked me into cleaning the pool. FML

by CantPublish / 04/12/2012 at 1:54pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I gave my grandparents my old cell to use since they needed an upgrade. I thought I had deleted everything until I received a text from my grandmother. It was a vagina shot I had taken for my fiancé with a message that said "You need to wear more makeup". FML

by ashleynicolle / 02/25/2012 at 1:16am / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML

by wellthatsawkward / 12/30/2011 at 1:35am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I dated smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML

by Ryan / 12/20/2011 at 12:57pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, my coworker friend told me she was going to the restroom. Soon after, I did the same. Once in the stall, I could smell a stench emanating from the next one. I yelled, "Ew, you stinky bitch" and sprayed air freshener under the partition. As I left the stall, my friend walked into the restroom. FML

by stinky / 12/11/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

by blondie101 / 12/09/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML

by notsohappilyeverafter / 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my 28-year-old brother who has been pranking me all my life, put a chocolate cupcake on my chair. I sat on it, with my white dress. On my wedding day. FML

by cupcake_butt / 10/17/2011 at 4:39am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the free clinic down the street to prove to my girlfriend I don't have any STDs so that we can finally have sex. Turns out I have one. FML

by happybudiess / 10/14/2011 at 12:30am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, while I was waiting in line at McDonalds, I found out I can sneeze, pee, and poop all at the same time. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my boyfriend I had an appointment for laser hair removal. He responded by making "pew pew" noises and pretending to shoot my underarms. He's 28. FML

by pixiebubz / 10/05/2011 at 11:59pm / Australia / Health

Today, I decided to get back into shape. I went for a jog around my neighborhood. The ice cream truck followed me for my whole jog, mocking me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2011 at 9:36am / United States (New York) / Health