Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

abdu_ajam

Search for a member

abdu_ajam

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 January 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 197
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

abdu_ajam's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of abdu_ajam's badges

abdu_ajam's favorite FMLs

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

#19791702
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12097) - you deserved it (25730)

On 06/15/2012 at 10:21am - kids - by habbsrule - Canada

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42673) - you deserved it (7876)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, my boyfriend spent an hour lecturing me on how I need to ask for what I want. So I asked him to delete a crappy picture he'd taken of me the night before. His response: "No, you don't always get what you want." FML

#14639216
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24683) - you deserved it (8712)

On 01/19/2011 at 2:19pm - love - by ugh (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend threw my X-box out the window, because I asked her how much she weighs. FML

#14023923
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23664) - you deserved it (50443)

On 11/29/2010 at 2:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I went to the grocery store where my husband works. I wanted to surprise him, so I went up behind him and started kissing his neck. He seemed to love it, and so did I, until I noticed it wasn't my husband. FML

#14023578
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10897) - you deserved it (41718)

On 11/29/2010 at 1:26pm - love - by vhtdgjj - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I wanted to punish a student for being late. I decided to start a pop quiz before he arrived. I was positive there wasn't enough time for him to finish. He scored full marks and I couldn't say a word. FML

#12693453
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8165) - you deserved it (68028)

On 08/23/2010 at 12:18am - kids - by K_M (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)

Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML

#9070560
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23714) - you deserved it (10031)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:49am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend kept trying to convince me to do anal with him. After denying him several times he told me "Why it feels good, trust me." I asked him how would he know. There was a long awkward silence when he then replied with "I'm not gay I swear." FML

#7563904
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30590) - you deserved it (4352)

On 01/25/2010 at 3:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

#6789121
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33092) - you deserved it (5345)

On 12/17/2009 at 2:57am - work - by Brittanyy_leigh (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was trying to sneak up my husband while he was playing a computer game. As I was getting behind the chair, he paused the game and sat up straight. I stopped. He turned around and sneezed violently and blew a bunch of snot into my face and eyes. FML

#5477011
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27304) - you deserved it (17201)

On 09/25/2009 at 11:47pm - health - by snottyface (woman) - United States

Today, while giving a lecture about gases to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud fart while they took some notes. I came back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wireless mic on. FML

#5033555
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14287) - you deserved it (41961)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:30am - work - by DrGas (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went into my part-time job at a drugstore. We always have one item we try and sell to every customer. For the next week I have to ask every person if they would like to try my nuts. FML

#4147298
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37186) - you deserved it (3977)

On 07/29/2009 at 11:17pm - misc - by arsenic660 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I received a "diamond ring" in Mafia Wars (a facebook app) from my boyfriend of 3 years. Along with the ring came a message. It read, "Will you marry me?" He was serious. FML

#3827229
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54960) - you deserved it (9138)

On 07/17/2009 at 8:56am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, three women came into my work and one was wearing a shirt with a rainbow that said, "We are everywhere". I had just gotten what it was referring to and when I greeted them I ended up saying "Hi gays!" instead of the standard "Hi guys". FML

#2494614
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18594) - you deserved it (46873)

On 06/01/2009 at 6:46am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, was my first meeting with business partners as I am new to the team. Instead of saying that I was looking forward to "stretching my legs" or "spreading my wings", I told them I was anxious to start "spreading my legs". FML

#1683242
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57317) - you deserved it (19953)

On 05/06/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: