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Mobility
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Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14817) - you deserved it (2024)
On 05/14/2012 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31362) - you deserved it (2941) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8445) - you deserved it (49967)
On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21270) - you deserved it (6611)
On 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by 504-A1 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15618) - you deserved it (1614)
On 05/10/2012 at 5:22pm - health - by Jesse (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19172) - you deserved it (3109)
On 05/10/2012 at 7:48am - love - by JG (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18171) - you deserved it (7247)
On 05/10/2012 at 2:44am - misc - by reddd - United States
Today, my neighbors got a motion sensor light that points at my window. It's so sensitive that it goes off every time an insect flies past. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14767) - you deserved it (965)
On 05/10/2012 at 2:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, I asked the girl I'm madly in love with out to dinner. When she asked me if I would pay, I jokingly said, "Well, that depends on how the date goes." She looked me up and down and said, "No thanks then." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13522) - you deserved it (9451)
On 04/29/2012 at 7:56pm - love - by -insert clever nickname here- - United States (Washington)
Today, I got home from work to find my boyfriend sobbing hysterically over the death of his cat. The only cat he could be talking about is the one on his Sims account. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18287) - you deserved it (1927)
On 04/21/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)
Today, while watching TV with my wife, I realized that we were still watching "My Little Pony" even though the kids had been asleep for half an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16195) - you deserved it (4412)
On 04/19/2012 at 12:08pm - misc - by ajnmegs - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was sleeping in after working a graveyard shift. I awoke to my girlfriend sneaking her stuff out of the house. She planned on leaving her key on my pillow and taking off without any notice whatsoever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15368) - you deserved it (1010)
On 04/17/2012 at 4:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. When it came time for us to leave, I saw him write something on the receipt for our waitress. I managed to get a quick look; it was his number. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24828) - you deserved it (1941)
On 04/17/2012 at 10:54am - love - by unloved (woman) - United States
Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24557) - you deserved it (1906)
On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I asked my boss if I could have a bigger cubicle. I'm now working in one that is half the size of my old one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14898) - you deserved it (4060)
On 04/12/2012 at 8:37pm - work - by hatemyboss - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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