About abbybailey204 : Hi, I'm Patrick. Most people think I'm funny, and fun to be around. I treat others the way they treat me. Period. You don't piss me off, I don't piss you off. It's how it works. Also, feel free to message me!
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abbybailey204's favorite FMLs
by Username / 12/16/2011 at 1:31am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by Anonymous / 12/13/2011 at 9:00am / Malaysia / Work
Today, my boyfriend insisted that the dog stay in our bedroom while we had sex. He said it would prove his dominance, and "show the dog who's boss." My boyfriend needs to prove his self-worth to an animal. FML
by HBC / 12/10/2011 at 2:23am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I walked out of the store, car keys in hand, only to discover my car was missing. After a frantic search, I started to hyperventilate and a nearly had a full-blown panic attack. Then I remembered I walked to the store. I am an idiot. FML
by picklemonger / 12/08/2011 at 2:58pm / Canada / Transportation
Today, I found out that what I thought could be a life-threatening issue causing me chest pains was only because I over-obsessed about it. Now not only do I have social anxiety, but I get so anxious I can create fake illnesses. FML
by daybyday / 11/22/2011 at 3:08am / Australia / Health
Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese customs, an officer pulled us aside, removed a suspicious metal object from my boyfriend's luggage and called six other officers to have a look. It was a kinky pair of handcuffs. FML
by notthatkinkyanyway / 11/13/2011 at 7:46am / China (Beijing) / Holidays
by ToInsecure4me / 11/10/2011 at 2:20pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work
by Korisite / 10/30/2011 at 1:31am / United States / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
by Darcy / 10/26/2011 at 2:58am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, in an incredibly busy shopping center bathroom with my 5 year-old niece, I was squatting over the toilet seat to avoid germs. My niece then says at the top of her voice, "Auntie, why are you sitting like a kangaroo?" I'd say the whole room pissed their pants laughing. FML
by Pissed / 10/05/2011 at 11:29am / Australia / Kids
- Today, I had to set parental controls on my iPad so my dad couldn't watch dirty videos on Youtube.… Today, my brother had a party with over 60 people in my basement. It turns out that five different… Today, I was fooling around with someone I had met at a club, in my room. It got really heated, and…