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aaronsnyder

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aaronsnyder

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  • Number of visits : 90
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aaronsnyder's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my new boss at my job is the same guy that I turned down repeatedly last night at the bar. FML

#3820845
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51462) - you deserved it (4060)

On 07/17/2009 at 1:02am - work - by awkward. (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to put a pretzel on my forehead while I was sleeping on the beach. I now have a pretzel-shaped tan line in the middle of my head. FML

#3816010
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43087) - you deserved it (8869)

On 07/16/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by joe1234 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to TGI Friday's with my crush. At the end of our meal, the waitress gave us mints with the bill. He said something that made me laugh, and I began choking on my mint. After a few coughs, I finally managed to get it out. It hit him in the forehead and landed in his drink. FML

#3811943
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40638) - you deserved it (4824)

On 07/16/2009 at 8:05pm - love - by CityGirl (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I took my daughter to the lake. She told me she had to go to the bathroom and I whispered to her "just pee in the lake, it's fine, but go in a little deeper." She went in the lake and turned to me to yell "MOM, IS THIS DEEP ENOUGH FOR ME TO PEE?" FML

#3804490
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11332) - you deserved it (56262)

On 07/16/2009 at 3:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while talking on the phone with my long distance boyfriend, he let me know that he was getting married in August to "some girl" for his papers. After I objected he told me, "well you can marry me if you want." I'm not sure if I just got dumped or proposed to. FML

#3804007
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45166) - you deserved it (5214)

On 07/16/2009 at 2:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was on webcam with my boyfriend. A while later I forgot about it and started digging my nose vigorously. He then beeped me and said "Digging for gold, dear? " FML

#3799208
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9502) - you deserved it (54170)

On 07/16/2009 at 11:09am - misc - by carmelita (woman) - Singapore

Today, my friend awoke me because I was talking in my sleep. When I asked her what I was talking about she replied with, "Let's just say you were having tea with the Queen of England. And a duck. You're really good at quacking." FML

#3799026
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36491) - you deserved it (4778)

On 07/16/2009 at 10:59am - misc - by MadMax (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my friend gave me a fortune cookie that said, "Don't be saddened by an upcoming event". Three hours later my girlfriend broke up with me because she said I was too superstitious. FML

#3793812
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40194) - you deserved it (5771)

On 07/16/2009 at 3:08am - misc - by joking0303 (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my wife gave me back my camera which she took on vacation to visit her parents with our 2-year old. I noticed the picture sequence had big gaps in the numbering. I ran an undelete on the card, and found 80+ pictures of her naked with another guy in her mom's bedroom. FML

#3792104
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91326) - you deserved it (4661)

On 07/16/2009 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my neighbor confessed to me that he was homophobic and regrets that his family doesnt know it. He spent fifteen minutes explaining how much he would hate to have a gay child. I spent two hours last night convincing his son that it was the right thing to tell his family he was gay. FML

#3776929
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52716) - you deserved it (4909)

On 07/15/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by mook (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

#3241027
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44911) - you deserved it (26763)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States

Today, while working at a fast food restaurant, I stayed a little overtime to help my manager with dishes. A kid pooped in the slide in the playground area attached to the restaurant itself. I'm the smallest one there. I had to crawl UP the slide to find and clean the poop. FML

#3228837
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39771) - you deserved it (3232)

On 06/26/2009 at 1:43am - work - by donezo (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I stayed after hours studying in the medical library. I was the only one left, and as I was going out the glass doors leaving, I saw a person's reflection behind me. I screamed, jumped, fell into the doors smashing my head. I'd seen the reflection of a medical demonstration dummy. FML

#3228073
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29770) - you deserved it (10641)

On 06/26/2009 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I rushed home to tell my parents my girlfriend had accepted my proposal. They asked how I could be so selfish at a time like this. Apparently, Michael Jackson's death is more important than their son. FML

#3215431
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73267) - you deserved it (6320)

On 06/25/2009 at 8:56pm - love - by Tom (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a man from across the bar looked at me, pointed and said "MMMM, now THAT'S what I want." Offended, I confronted him to tell him I felt disrespected by him referring to me as 'that.' Turns out, he was pointing to the cheeseburger that the waitress behind me was holding. FML

#3207730
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8046) - you deserved it (48660)

On 06/25/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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