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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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_blah_blah_
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 198
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About _blah_blah_ : I have no life.

_blah_blah_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

_blah_blah_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML

#2514787 (231)

I agree, your life sucks (22279) - you deserved it (46267)

On 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm - health - by dearme (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband of ten years was playing the Sims. I asked him about the house he built. Apparently, it was his dream house, and he recreated himself as a Sim so he could live in it. Then I asked him where the wife was. There was no wife. It was his happy place. FML

#2464746 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (40380) - you deserved it (7052)

On 05/31/2009 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - Poland (Katowice)

Today, I met this really nice guy at the mall and he gave me his number. Later that night, I texted him. We got on the subject of food, and I started talking about how much I love veal. He responded with saying I was supporting animal murder, that I should go to hell and lose his number. FML

#2449996 (399)

I agree, your life sucks (34159) - you deserved it (13877)

On 05/30/2009 at 11:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while playing The Sims 2, I realized I had a virtual person's whole life planned out, and have nothing planned out for myself. FML

#2282395 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (15727) - you deserved it (32964)

On 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by drurbanXVII (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

#2209832 (393)

I agree, your life sucks (41157) - you deserved it (15446)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by Tootsy_Roll_Pop (man) - United States

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348 (832)

I agree, your life sucks (32050) - you deserved it (381650)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938 (1736)

I agree, your life sucks (362917) - you deserved it (401238)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up and it was Monday. FML

#2635 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (26676) - you deserved it (6146)

On 01/26/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by buddy - United States (Michigan)

Today, I danced with a girl until the bar closed. We went back to my place. She had a penis. FML

#2248 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (32661) - you deserved it (5585)

On 01/22/2009 at 6:27pm - love - by Noname - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was so bored that I filmed my goldfish while it was eating. FML

#923 (32)

I agree, your life sucks (12096) - you deserved it (3344)

On 01/10/2009 at 3:21am - animals - by Crystal - Sent from mobile version

Today, I wanted to see if the frying pan was hot. I no longer have fingerprints. FML

#518 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (4332) - you deserved it (30777)

On 12/15/2008 at 12:36am - misc - by bip - Sent from mobile version

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

#258 (32)

I agree, your life sucks (14395) - you deserved it (8172)

On 11/09/2008 at 4:18am - health - by Noname - Sent from mobile version