_anonymoose_

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_anonymoose_

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7042
  • Number of comments : 67
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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_anonymoose_'s page activity

Visits<b>Pokefinch27</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 12:00pm<b>antigravityfall</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:36am<b>Ilikepie82479</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 1:06am<b>MikanDeath</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 10:48pm<b>ares99</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 4:03pm<b>Jaybob98</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:08pm<b>blondie1504</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 6:16pm<b>mcr2000</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 11:16pm<b>Lop0</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 9:04pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 11:56pm<b>kingofswedes</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 2:34am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:02pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 9:29am<b>marcoe</b> - the 12/20/2009 at 4:03am<b>Ciurchi</b> - the 11/22/2009 at 4:59am<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/18/2009 at 4:31pm<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 11/05/2009 at 1:11am<b>Daaniellee1234</b> - the 09/21/2009 at 1:37am

_anonymoose_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

_anonymoose_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

by obsessed / 11/27/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I put on my hazard lights, pulled over to the side of the road, and stopped traffic on a busy road to rescue a black cat that had been hit by a car. With everyone watching, I got a towel and slowly approached the cat. It was a garbage bag. FML

Today, I found out that some men think it's ok to clip their fingernails, at the table, in a restaurant, on a first date. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2009 at 5:13am / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, my condo board refused to lift the new policy requiring pet owners to carry dogs in common areas because someone's dog is peeing in the hall. I can't physically carry my two dogs, so I'm now forced to wheel them through the building in a borrowed baby stroller. FML

by Slivered / 11/18/2009 at 4:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I found out that my dad has been having an affair. With my formerly favorite teacher. The best part? Yesterday, she announced to the class that she was pregnant. I clapped and congratulated her. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 10:28pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me if the tooth fairy was real. I said yes, and she said she wanted to try to catch her. Later, she pulled out a tooth and put it under her pillow. I came in to take out the tooth and replace it with money. There were mouse traps behind her pillow. FML

by snapped / 11/12/2009 at 11:19pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, I found out that I'm 8 weeks pregnant. Tomorrow, I'm supposed to be leaving for Paris with my college abstinence group for a year. FML

by Anonymous / 11/10/2009 at 7:28pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, the 86 year old guy next door told me I needed three things in life to succeed: a cook book, a boyfriend, and a boob job. FML

by Anonymous / 10/12/2009 at 4:57pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2009 at 3:04pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2009 at 7:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML

by scaredtosleep / 09/24/2009 at 5:50am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, my navy boyfriend, who's stationed in Italy, calls me to say he is in San Francisco and is coming to see me. After scrambling to get ready, he calls me back to say he doesn't recognize the train station. After searching on Google Maps, it becomes clear he's drunk at Oktoberfest. In Germany. FML

by Spatch / 09/23/2009 at 10:47pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was home alone, and decided to do some naked cleaning just because I could. After half an hour of liberating nakie-dusting, I turn around to see my boyfriend and his best friend gaping at me open mouthed. His older brother however gave a creepy smile and the thumbs up. FML

by DusterOverBits / 09/23/2009 at 5:35am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in my psychology class taking the hardest test ever. After I spent most of the period trying to fill in the few answers that I knew, I looked up to see everyone with their notebooks on their desks. It was an open-note test. FML

by Anonymous / 09/18/2009 at 5:31pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard my dad screaming in the hallway. Thinking he was having a heart attack I ran to the hall without looking where I was going. I slipped and slid towards my dad in what turned out to be a mass quantity of diarrhea from one of my two dogs. He was screaming because he stepped in it. FML

by poopEVERYWHERE / 09/18/2009 at 10:27am / United States (Illinois) / Animals