Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

_Noon_

Search for a member

_Noon_

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 September 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5510
  • Number of comments : 447
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About _Noon_ : -

_Noon_'s page activity

Visits<b>MrCheeseOnToast</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 9:29am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 9:08am<b>Vanlendauman</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:15pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 8:04pm<b>PurpleDarthVader</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 12:47am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 6:36pm<b>rachelpayne18</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 5:06pm<b>jckxzie</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 6:20pm<b>rhiannahoward14</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 7:04pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 3:18pm<b>Furby94</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 3:21pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 11:41pm<b>tonjuu</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:25pm<b>Wingman527</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 10:23pm<b>MaryssaJean</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 11:52pm<b>LuapMere</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 6:19pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 8:51pm<b>teotsi</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 3:48am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 3:08pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 1:04am<b>Wingman527</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 4:23am

_Noon_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

_Noon_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML

#981592
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95628) - you deserved it (39077)

On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 5 years getting intimate with my best friend. When they saw me they immediately stopped and said nothing. After about 5 seconds of silence my boyfriend yells "April fools!" April Fools was 12 days ago. FML

#923154
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (125932) - you deserved it (6970)

On 04/12/2009 at 6:47am - misc - by Aprilfools (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I asked my girl friend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said was that good. She was serious. FML

#909616
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67731) - you deserved it (19970)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40850) - you deserved it (135159)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

#869023
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16832) - you deserved it (92735)

On 04/08/2009 at 10:48am - work - by StevieMe (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at IKEA with my parents. I walked away from them and later I heard the speaker of the store call my name asking me to come to the playground because my mom and dad were worried. I'm 18. FML

#832859
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69350) - you deserved it (4554)

On 04/06/2009 at 10:12am - misc - by BrilsmurfO_O (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I finally passed a math exam. I go home super excited to tell my mom, yelling "Mom! Guess what!?!?!" She turns to me all happy and goes "You finally got a boyfriend!?!?!?" FML

#698857
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61617) - you deserved it (6770)

On 03/30/2009 at 6:14am - misc - by wasntme (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I was jogging through my neighborhood and then I notice this cute guy running beside me, we stoped and flirted for a while and my mom drove past. She then rolled down the window and said "Honey, you owe me for the dry cleaning on your period pants." FML

#660831
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95314) - you deserved it (5138)

On 03/28/2009 at 12:50pm - misc - by Lolrus - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, I was having lunch with my sister and my mother. While my mom was busy ordering food, my sister said to me, "look at this face I can make!" and she grossly contorted her face so that she had a double chin. My mother looked over and said to her, "stop making fun of your sister!" FML

#554363
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68758) - you deserved it (4913)

On 03/23/2009 at 3:22pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

#497309
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29772) - you deserved it (111193)

On 03/20/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Stacy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML

#434812
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45093) - you deserved it (24211)

On 03/18/2009 at 3:59am - misc - by elevator-troubles (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I was running late for work so instead of walking the ten minutes to the office, I took a taxi. The driver took the opportunity to share the story of his first sexual experience with a man. In great detail. FML

#279644
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86082) - you deserved it (13559)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:06am - intimacy - by Noname - Philippines (Cebu City)

Today, I was going to a Harry Potter convention since I love the books so much. On my drive there I got lost, and it only got worse when my car broke down. Since I forgot my cell phone I decided to try and hitch a ride. I stood on the side of a road for two hours dressed like Ron Weasley. FML

#238492
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28613) - you deserved it (55112)

On 03/07/2009 at 11:03pm - misc - by GrLifeusx (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

#160435
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27798) - you deserved it (96133)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2 : School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: