Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

_Noon_

Search for a member

_Noon_

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 September 1989 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4814
  • Number of comments : 447
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About _Noon_ : -

_Noon_'s page activity

Visits<b>MaryssaJean</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 11:52pm<b>LuapMere</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 6:19pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 8:51pm<b>teotsi</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 3:48am<b>CaptFappingtons</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 10:12pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 10:42am<b>julako</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 4:45pm<b>jarrettd</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 9:27am<b>crapmaster3000</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 12:09am<b>Thorvald22</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 8:34am<b>femalemisfit</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 1:05am<b>RainbowShine</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 1:45pm<b>iamkats</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 12:49am<b>DementedOtaku</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 10:26pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 3:24am<b>Tempted1</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 9:58am<b>mjarts2013</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 10:49pm<b>valipali</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 8:46am

_Noon_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

_Noon_'s favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML

#8612745
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34451) - you deserved it (4915)

On 02/24/2010 at 10:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I did a 'dine and dash' and left my phone in the restaurant. The owner answered my phone call. FML

#7321652
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4484) - you deserved it (71959)

On 01/13/2010 at 4:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had the sudden urge to sneeze as I was wiping my ass. Out of instinct, I used my hand to cover my mouth. I never let go of the toilet paper. FML

#7217520
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25371) - you deserved it (32380)

On 01/08/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by Hugh_Jankles (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband is completely convinced that his taking a massive dump after being constipated is exactly like the time I gave birth to our twins. FML

#7215962
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30359) - you deserved it (3935)

On 01/08/2010 at 11:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my brother and I got in a fight and he told my friends that I am mentally disabled. They believed him. Apparently, "everything makes sense now." FML

#6730698
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26355) - you deserved it (3333)

On 12/12/2009 at 11:39pm - misc - by Normal (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML

#5872159
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42239) - you deserved it (3253)

On 10/17/2009 at 10:25pm - love - by userrrrr - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

#5774504
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52891) - you deserved it (26849)

On 10/11/2009 at 11:42am - misc - by oxjessiiox (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML

#5721676
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74781) - you deserved it (5486)

On 10/08/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while working on my girlfriend of three years' computer I found a file called 'My future wedding'. I assumed it was very old and decided to look through it. Of the list of 5 potential grooms I was not one of them. This didn't bother me until I saw that it had last been edited two days ago. FML

#5721325
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37620) - you deserved it (3894)

On 10/08/2009 at 1:31pm - love - by Rage (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I moved out of my parents basement. After I hugged my parents I walked out the door only to remember I left my phone in the kitchen. I open the door and see my parents dancing. FML

#5644801
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32503) - you deserved it (12528)

On 10/04/2009 at 4:31pm - misc - by neverStopLaughin - United States (Colorado)

Today, during the opening night performance of our schools musical, while I wasn't on stage I decided to use the restroom. I came out to find two of my fellow actresses putting their hands over my mouth. Apparently, I had left my microphone on and everyone heard me using the restroom. FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML

#5494730
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48490) - you deserved it (3753)

On 09/26/2009 at 10:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while at a club, I walked up to a cutie who had been eyeing me all night. I asked him "Is that a phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?". He simply replied "It's a phone" before walking away. FML

#5482738
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7890) - you deserved it (46303)

On 09/26/2009 at 10:15am - misc - by desperate (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)

Today, I got flowers at work. I was excited until I saw they were from my good friend saying, "Sorry for sleeping with your boyfriend!" FML

#5446240
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43659) - you deserved it (2420)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:16pm - love - by Tally (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: