Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

_Naomi_

Search for a member

_Naomi_

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3795
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

_Naomi_'s page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:50pm<b>beth12</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 9:24pm

_Naomi_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

_Naomi_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a shoe store. I picked up a shoe so I could look at it, but when I put it back on the shelf, the whole shelf fell down, making all the shoes fall to the ground. The people behind the counter started clapping. FML

#7090975
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22154) - you deserved it (3394)

On 01/01/2010 at 9:45pm - misc - by shoes (woman) - United States

Today, it's Saturday. While all my friends go out to have fun, I get my excitement thinking about how I'll be sleeping with a new pillow. FML

#6733477
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23490) - you deserved it (6095)

On 12/13/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by soy_un_perderdor (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

#6472262
387 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7237) - you deserved it (80220)

On 11/27/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by obsessed (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found out that the plant in my kitchen that I have been watering for almost 2 years is fake. FML

#6453438
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9461) - you deserved it (48681)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by IlikeGreenPlants (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I watched Paranormal Activity which is known to be the scariest film ever. After the film, I went to brush my teeth and out of the corner of my eye I saw the bathroom door closing by itself. I jumped out of my skin and stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush. It was just my dog. FML

#6436100
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11776) - you deserved it (30418)

On 11/24/2009 at 1:45pm - animals - by J (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I received two letters, one from my mom, other from my dad, about how much they missed me with me not being around them. I called my mom, feeling sad. She didn't sound sad at all. She asked me which letter was better. My parents were competing each other which letter would be more moving. FML

#6424170
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22598) - you deserved it (1971)

On 11/23/2009 at 7:07pm - love - by ssjin93 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend left for a month-long trip with his buddies. I stood near the door waiting for a goodbye kiss. He kissed his xbox goodbye instead. FML

#5759399
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35552) - you deserved it (5243)

On 10/10/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by kissless (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML

#5721676
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74830) - you deserved it (5490)

On 10/08/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was on the phone with my friend, when my four year old nephew came in, asking who I was talking to. I told him it was Santa Claus, so he insisted on talking to him. I handed over the phone and I hear, "Santa is fake. Grow up." I spent the next two hours with a screaming child proving Santa exists. FML

#5716495
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12563) - you deserved it (36762)

On 10/08/2009 at 1:14am - kids - by stupidsantaclaus (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was picking up my 10 year old step-son from the airport. He began screaming and crying saying that I wasn't his father. I ended up sitting in a holding room because the security guards thought I was kidnapping him. My wife thought it was hilarious. FML

#5525269
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42641) - you deserved it (2922)

On 09/28/2009 at 11:13am - kids - by justgreat (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I learned to check inside the oven before you preheat it. Sometimes children hide their pet rabbit in there. FML

#5522422
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66732) - you deserved it (9023)

On 09/28/2009 at 3:15am - misc - by ripfluffy (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, after coming home from hanging out with a few friends, my mom told me that I shouldn't hang out with them any more. Why? Because "they are way hotter than I am and I'll never get a boyfriend if I'm always the ugly one in my group." FML

#5515863
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39911) - you deserved it (2951)

On 09/27/2009 at 9:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML

#5515193
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46846) - you deserved it (4587)

On 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by screwwyou (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I missed my bus by a minute. I called up my step dad asking him if he can drive me because I had a test first period. After about calling him twenty times, and him not picking up, I see him drive by the bus stop pointing at me and laughing hysterically. FML

#5448757
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40849) - you deserved it (3822)

On 09/24/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by NotFunny (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML

#5443972
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60636) - you deserved it (2464)

On 09/24/2009 at 5:50am - misc - by scaredtosleep (man) - United Kingdom (London)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: