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_Fmyknife_

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_Fmyknife_

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 6 May 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 377
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About _Fmyknife_ : Jesus is my only friend :(

_Fmyknife_'s page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:25pm<b>heroin</b> - the 03/12/2010 at 12:25am

_Fmyknife_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

_Fmyknife_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing basketball outside in my driveway. I saw three cute girls walking by, so I thought I would try to show off a little by doing a backwards slam dunk. I jumped, completely missed the rim and hit my head on the backboard. Then my mom ran out to help me up. FML

#13401445
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8534) - you deserved it (36624)

On 10/11/2010 at 12:59am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was walking by a pond when I saw a small frog. I decided to catch it to get a close look. After I picked it up, I realized that it was not a frog. It was dog shit shaped like a frog. FML

#7776158
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11182) - you deserved it (32975)

On 02/01/2010 at 9:34am - animals - by adad - Sent from mobile version

Today, the guy I've had a crush on came over to my house. My Dad came in to see how we we're doing, looks at me and says "Man... You've REALLY been puttin' on the pounds!", pokes me in the stomach a few times, and leaves. FML

#6968150
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28667) - you deserved it (3596)

On 12/27/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Fatty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I noticed a girl looking at me on the train. Playing it cool, I decided to give her a smile and see what would happen. It came out as a creepy, seedy grin, prompting her to call security. FML

#6953786
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22891) - you deserved it (9081)

On 12/26/2009 at 7:06am - misc - by creepyguy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my family and I are driving down to France and it's going to take 4 hours. If that wasn't bad enough, my mum decides that she is going to listen to the CD my sister bought her for Christmas on repeat for the whole journey. It's Lady Gaga. FML

#6953630
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33538) - you deserved it (8533)

On 12/26/2009 at 6:42am - misc - by OhGodKillMeNow (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

#6937557
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30632) - you deserved it (6905)

On 12/25/2009 at 11:15am - kids - by BathroomMuch (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 25 year old brother ran into my room very excited at 8am. "Wake up! We got a new puppy!" he told me. I was so excited so I jumped out of my warm bed. When I asked him if he was serious he said "No, but we have to go to church, so get dressed." FML

#6937151
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27376) - you deserved it (8452)

On 12/25/2009 at 10:30am - misc - by MessyMal (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26616) - you deserved it (11811)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride:1 - Getting Laid:0. FML

#4673205
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9382) - you deserved it (91567)

On 08/20/2009 at 1:45am - love - by razgriz1 (man) - United States (Washington)



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