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Zya's favorite FMLs
Today, I arrived home. I'd left for a business trip 5 days earlier, and trusted my husband with our young boys. As soon as I stepped in the door, I noticed my son had thinner hair than when I'd left. He then showed me an empty container of Nair. FML
by ProudMama / 01/07/2012 at 7:50pm / United States (Nebraska) / Kids
Today, I ignored my phone, as my mother has dementia and calls me 15 or so times a day, thinking each time is the first. I braved horrendous rain and gale-force winds to go to work. Turns out it was work calling to tell me not to bother coming in. FML
by sparkx555 / 01/03/2012 at 11:07am / United Kingdom (London) / Work
by myjobsucks / 12/12/2011 at 9:15pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work
by unknown / 12/12/2011 at 9:04pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was out selling Christmas-themed calendars for charity door-to-door. I rang a doorbell and a wild-eyed man appeared at the door, shouted about being "on nights" and that I'd woken him up, called me a "bell end", threw a newspaper at me and slammed the door in my face. FML
by firemansam / 12/12/2011 at 6:36am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML
by Anonymous / 10/22/2011 at 5:51pm / Canada (Northwest Territories) / Health
by brokenbabe / 06/21/2011 at 10:38pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love
by minnEmouse / 06/20/2011 at 10:40pm / United States / Love
by drycleanplz / 06/20/2011 at 10:33pm / Reserved / Miscellaneous
by shyshy96679 / 06/20/2011 at 6:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by heather / 06/20/2011 at 6:25pm / Canada / Love
by Anonymous / 06/18/2011 at 9:11pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous
by iDisable / 06/18/2011 at 8:27pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was on a flight home. I wasn't going to arrive until midnight, so I was offered an earlier flight that got back at ten. I got to baggage claims and it turned out they lost my bag. I sat there for 2 hours. The people on my original flight left for home before I did. FML
by me / 06/18/2011 at 7:54pm / United States (Colorado) / Transportation
Today, I'm trying to come up with a plausible explanation for my co-workers as to why I have stitches in my face. I'm not sure I want to admit that I was clawed by a pigeon as I opened my garage door. FML
by Anonyme / 06/10/2011 at 7:07pm / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Animals
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…