About Zorori : Asian, Asian, Asian, Japanophile, Asian, Asian.
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Today, I sent in an assignment from my batshit insane teacher. The assignment was to read a poem, analyze it, and make a comic of its plot. This would've been fine if the teacher who assigned it to me didn't teach math. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17614) - you deserved it (1083)
On 12/09/2012 at 10:53pm - work - by bestnameright - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14188) - you deserved it (5012)
On 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE (man) - United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham)
Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7362) - you deserved it (50189)
On 12/09/2012 at 11:57am - intimacy - by SamWGovan (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I found out my new girlfriend is a screamer. This would normally turn me on, except she sounds like she's being murdered with a rusty fork. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24252) - you deserved it (2401)
On 12/06/2012 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Dontwaketheneighbors (man) - United States (California)
Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15193) - you deserved it (1488)
On 12/03/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by VedaLynn - United States
Today, I was slapped across the face by a girl in the waiting room at the dentist's office. She thought I was taking a picture of her breasts with my phone. I was smiling while reading other people's FMLs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31161) - you deserved it (2170)
On 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by karmamaybe - United States (South Dakota)
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20227) - you deserved it (2518)
On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada
Today, my step-mom restarted the computer because she thought she'd downloaded a virus that stopped her from being able to click on anything, erasing my 7-page paper in the process. It turns out it was just the batteries dying in our wireless mouse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16678) - you deserved it (8752)
On 11/27/2012 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, a few of my friends and I went laser tagging. I had been smart enough to wear black since I know white glows in the dark. Unfortunately, the dandruff glowing in my hair gave me away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14058) - you deserved it (5651)
On 11/27/2012 at 12:06am - misc - by tarlyo2012 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I ran into my sister, who nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23600) - you deserved it (2905)
On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, in a state of extreme boredom, I decided to dress my 6-month-old son in girl's clothes. As he sat in my lap in a frilly dress, and as I was placing a very pink and lacy bow on his head, my mother-in-law unexpectedly walked in. She now thinks I'm mentally unstable and should be in therapy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8510) - you deserved it (25108)
On 11/26/2012 at 11:52am - kids - by ekm86 (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was rejected for a dream photography job that involves travelling all over the world, because according to the interviewer, half the photos in my nature portfolio were "blatantly photoshopped." I guess reality isn't realistic enough for some people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18262) - you deserved it (1014)
On 11/23/2012 at 8:29pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36467) - you deserved it (9576)
On 11/23/2012 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Embarassed (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14019) - you deserved it (2538)
On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I tried to motivate my 9-year-old sister to clean her room. She said she'd only agree if she could kill me. Thinking she was just kidding around, and not a total psychopath, I said sure. She ran to her room shouting, "Yes! I'm gonna use the big knife!" She's still cleaning now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17984) - you deserved it (3707)
On 11/21/2012 at 2:34pm - kids - by anon - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Monday 20 May 2013
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