About Zorori : Asian, Asian, Asian, Japanophile, Asian, Asian.
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Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21442) - you deserved it (10293)
On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland
Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26136) - you deserved it (10130) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/18/2013 at 6:39am - animals - by dormeur - Sent from mobile version
Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23468) - you deserved it (2076)
On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)
Today, at work, a little girl came in and asked if we had any dance clothes. As I showed her, I asked if she was in a competition. When she said yes, I crossed my fingers and told her I hoped she would win. Unfortunately, I didn't cross them properly and I accidentally gave her the finger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9523) - you deserved it (26000)
On 01/09/2013 at 5:42am - work - by georgiamarshall_ - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my dad made a voodoo doll out of a melon. This seems to happen a lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16625) - you deserved it (1698)
Today, my boss "borrowed" my prescription sunglasses off my desk. She crashed her car because they made her dizzy, and thinks I should pay for the damages. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40432) - you deserved it (1763)
On 01/08/2013 at 12:45pm - work - by whateven (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25483) - you deserved it (3294)
On 01/08/2013 at 12:10pm - misc - by troll of a gran - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25086) - you deserved it (10326)
On 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm - misc - by Les Miserables is so sad (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28746) - you deserved it (5420)
On 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by lonely dreams - United States (Nevada)
Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42427) - you deserved it (3135)
On 01/01/2013 at 10:20am - intimacy - by ashbeat - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33652) - you deserved it (9861)
On 01/01/2013 at 5:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)
Today, during the countdown to midnight, I looked for my girlfriend so I could kiss her as 2013 began. I found her just in time to see her making out with some guy she swore was "only a friend." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38100) - you deserved it (2050)
On 01/01/2013 at 2:50am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my brother thought New Year's would be more epic and memorable if the fireworks were set off in the family room and not outside. It is memorable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26483) - you deserved it (1909)
On 01/01/2013 at 1:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, while buying paint, I began to help an elderly woman working to lift some heavy boxes. She told me what a nice young lady I was. Then her boss came over, screamed at her for being lazy and fired her. She cried. So did I. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39172) - you deserved it (2498)
On 12/31/2012 at 10:44am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with the prettiest, most simple ring I have ever seen. I called my sister to tell her the good news, and her response was, "I know. He had me steal the ring from Claire's." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32237) - you deserved it (2315)
On 12/30/2012 at 6:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Monday 17 June 2013
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