About Zorori : Asian, Asian, Asian, Japanophile, Asian, Asian.
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Today, my husband rejected sleeping with me because he wants to "save his energy" for building his custom car. Apparently, I'm a "distraction." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37987) - you deserved it (4977)
On 04/23/2013 at 9:38am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43583) - you deserved it (5011)
On 04/23/2013 at 7:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I discovered why my boss kept on scheduling me to work doubles almost every day. It wasn't because she knew I needed the extra money; she was hoping that my boyfriend would break up with me because I'm never home, and date her instead. It worked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57702) - you deserved it (3438)
On 04/23/2013 at 4:17am - love - by mybossisanass (woman) - United States
Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28585) - you deserved it (94540)
Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48704) - you deserved it (2867)
On 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45484) - you deserved it (5370)
On 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I had to break up with my girlfriend twice. Apparently the first time she thought I was kidding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34644) - you deserved it (5570)
On 04/18/2013 at 6:47pm - love - by RaveCharlie - United States
Today, I admitted to my parents that I'm a pathological liar and I would like to go get help. They didn't believe me, and told me stop making stuff up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35864) - you deserved it (5689)
On 04/17/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by Aaronator25 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54817) - you deserved it (14245)
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML
I agree, your life sucks (56167) - you deserved it (9431)
On 04/16/2013 at 9:27am - intimacy - by notacaveman (man) - Netherlands
Today, working in customer support, I received a call from a woman who'd just been robbed. My supervisor asked what was taking so long; I told him that she was hysterical. He took my phone and told her to call back when she had her "shit together", then hung up. I take orders from this man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35619) - you deserved it (3010)
On 04/16/2013 at 6:50am - work - by no compassion - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was about to break up with my psycho girlfriend. As I sat her down, she told me she wanted to show me something. She then took off her shirt to reveal my name tattooed across her chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59904) - you deserved it (6186)
On 04/16/2013 at 3:23am - love - by guess I'm stuck - United States (California)
Today, when I was talking to my younger brother, he suddenly said "Oh, I was supposed to tell you that there's this girl who has a huge crush on you!" I asked who and he answered, "I totally forgot her name, that was like 2 months ago." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42175) - you deserved it (3116)
On 04/14/2013 at 3:28am - love - by MissedTheBoat (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54553) - you deserved it (9167)
On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)
Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40821) - you deserved it (4245)
On 04/10/2013 at 6:17pm - love - by drama king? (man) - United States (Missouri)
Monday 20 May 2013
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