Zodoy

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Offline (the 12/15/2014 at 12:06am)

Zodoy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 29 December 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 220
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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Zodoy's page activity

Visits<b>xKG33x</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 11:19pm

Zodoy's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Zodoy's badges

Zodoy's favorite FMLs

Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

by thebeachisthatway / 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I discovered my son, who has recently moved out of our home, eating his dog's food. His excuse? He wanted the new Pokemon game, and "compromises had to be made". FML

by anon / 10/18/2012 at 4:33am / Australia / Kids

Today, while mowing the lawn, I was attacked by an underground hornet nest. I now have many stings, two scared dogs, and a mower still running outside. The hornets are swarming it and some are sitting on the lever, as if to turn it off. It's like they know. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2012 at 4:08pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to spank the ferret in bed and spray me while singing the Spiderman theme song. FML

by BabyG2222 / 09/29/2012 at 5:14am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast". That is not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML

by Leashaness / 09/15/2012 at 7:07am / United States / Health

Today, I found out there's a rumor going around that my smoking hot co-worker and I had sex over the weekend. I'm not nearly as pissed off about the rumor as I am by the fact that I can't remember it because I was too drunk. FML

by bruisedego31 / 09/12/2012 at 5:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML

by JB / 09/09/2012 at 4:34am / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML

by Anonymous / 06/17/2012 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 1:46am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

by Danny / 01/07/2012 at 5:27am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I spent thirty minutes in the shower trying to remove "Pierre", a face complete with moustache that my girlfriend drew in sharpie on the tip of my cock. FML

by Anonymous / 08/31/2011 at 10:23am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Intimacy

Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML

by NaniNarcotic / 08/16/2011 at 6:17am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2011 at 3:24am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy