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Zakman11

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Zakman11

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 411
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Zakman11's page activity

Visits<b>vrossie_</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 1:40am<b>actuallyahippo</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 11:13am<b>emxy92</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 6:33pm<b>MiaPine</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 10:42pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 12:45am<b>dinosxxrawr</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 3:04am<b>TheAnonymousUno</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 6:29pm<b>Coopzorz</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 9:07am<b>Alonzo_5841</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 2:00pm<b>thenamesbrooksy</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 7:25pm<b>WubStep_</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 2:30pm<b>GuernseyGirl</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 3:50pm<b>fmloverlife</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 4:24am<b>JoshuahColins</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:53am<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:39am<b>Dust_man1</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 1:09pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 10:26am<b>cuppycakeslove</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 4:14am

Zakman11's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Zakman11's badges

Zakman11's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML

#21159254
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59551) - you deserved it (8450)

On 06/01/2014 at 11:51am - intimacy - by help me - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML

#21068134
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50485) - you deserved it (9270)

On 02/22/2014 at 12:39am - intimacy - by awkward (man) - United States

Today, the rash on my thigh started itching again. I felt good after a vigorous scratch, but the relief did not extend to my roommate, who only saw me at my laptop with my hand moving up and down in my pants. FML

#21067820
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41041) - you deserved it (7307)

On 02/21/2014 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by Sexy Rash (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a guy called customer support, claiming his internet wasn't working. I asked for his customer details, and he gave his name as Mike Hunt. I recognized the old joke, called him an idiot, and hung up on him. It turned out that was his real name. I'm now on suspension. FML

#21060478
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25848) - you deserved it (31744)

On 02/14/2014 at 4:39pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, and for the past week, my dog started barking at my door when I start masturbating. I think my mom is starting to suspect. FML

#21037288
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43894) - you deserved it (9916)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:06pm - intimacy - by fappy dog - United States (Illinois)

Today, my plans for having sex with my girlfriend were thwarted for the sixth time in a row by my own mother. I found out later that she's been reading my texts so she knew when to drop by and ruin everything. FML

#21035329
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50211) - you deserved it (9908)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by MM - United States (Maine)

Today, I visited my girlfriend at her place, one thing lead to another, and we had sex for the first time. Her normally very sweet cat now hisses and savages me if I so much as look at him. FML

#21034982
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42688) - you deserved it (7036)

On 01/21/2014 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by idiot says pussy (man) - United States

Today, I noticed that the condom in my wallet has been there so long it's left a mark. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. After a while, he started staring at my lady parts, and said my "vag looks like a mockingjay". He then stretched the lips apart like wings and made little "CA-CAW CA-CAW!" sounds. FML

#21033383
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55937) - you deserved it (8992)

On 01/19/2014 at 10:59pm - intimacy - by Goodyear (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML

#21016853
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57637) - you deserved it (7818)

On 01/04/2014 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by fuckmuppeter512 (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML

#21015691
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62481) - you deserved it (7345)

On 01/03/2014 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by notsohandy (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I tried to time my ejaculation to happen right as the new year started. FML

#21012409
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47733) - you deserved it (11198)

On 01/01/2014 at 1:41am - intimacy - by Lonesome (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was watching TV with my husband, and he started getting frisky. When the commercial break started, we started having sex. When he came, there were still two commercials left before the show resumed. FML

#21011750
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51797) - you deserved it (6018)

On 12/31/2013 at 4:19pm - intimacy - by erjazo (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML

#20991588
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49725) - you deserved it (4560)

On 12/13/2013 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by puking now (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML

#20983710
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58423) - you deserved it (18347)

On 12/07/2013 at 9:55am - intimacy - by feiedbutter - Canada (Ontario)



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