Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Xxak907xX

Search for a member

Xxak907xX

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 June 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2092
  • Number of comments : 164
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 29 posted

About Xxak907xX : Well.....

Xxak907xX's page activity

Visits<b>ethan_unoxx</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:08am<b>drpepper2019</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 5:20pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:33pm<b>vivian_rae</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:32pm<b>lillord55</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:34am<b>wopchop12</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 10:10pm<b>liquidbacon</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 11:09am<b>Kitty19</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 6:12pm<b>MrRicko500</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 5:29pm<b>EnjoyYourLife</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 3:46am<b>MBSC</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 12:16pm<b>arimylove</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 5:10am<b>Jazzyw1997</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 11:45am<b>shellykjelly</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 3:25am<b>soursopp</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 1:56am<b>Aeroxx1337</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 7:26pm<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 11:13pm<b>noncom</b> - the 04/24/2013 at 7:29pm

Xxak907xX's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Xxak907xX's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out I was born as a result of someone switching my mom's birth control pills with tic tac. FML

#16129484
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44281) - you deserved it (3762)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my roommate is still convinced that she is a cat. FML

#16099079
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27253) - you deserved it (3295)

On 05/08/2011 at 11:22pm - animals - by SMCHR (woman) - Ireland

Today, I was in a parking lot looking for a spot, and after driving around for a long while I finally found one. A homeless man was taking a shit on it. FML

#16097494
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24459) - you deserved it (2620)

On 05/08/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by jackpot - Venezuela

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

#15935332
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39104) - you deserved it (12190)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:20pm - kids - by nomorexbox - United States (Georgia)

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49192) - you deserved it (5784)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML

#15867292
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28511) - you deserved it (11601)

On 04/20/2011 at 11:24pm - misc - by embarassed (woman) - United States

Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML

#15800511
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28381) - you deserved it (5741)

On 04/15/2011 at 10:04pm - work - by :| - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at 6am I was waiting for the tram to go home from my late night job. A homeless man came up to me and offered to buy me a beer because "guys like us have to stick together." FML

#15754863
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30095) - you deserved it (4490)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:02pm - misc - by ihaveahome (man) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, a stoned man tried to break into my house. Naked. FML

#15719480
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37348) - you deserved it (4126)

On 04/10/2011 at 2:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got back from vacation and walked in on my boyfriend and my brother in my bed. FML

#15617038
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (107765) - you deserved it (7602)

On 04/03/2011 at 4:06am - intimacy - by Now Single - Reserved

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

#15580957
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32131) - you deserved it (6498)

On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML

#15550416
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34233) - you deserved it (3490)

On 03/29/2011 at 7:58pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was hanging out with the guy I like. All of a sudden, he pulls out a small vial of his blood to give to me, proving his undying love. Curious, I asked where he had gotten the blood. His answer? A razor blade. In his nose. FML

#15479009
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31007) - you deserved it (5037)

On 03/25/2011 at 4:50am - misc - by radicaloser - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mom banned me from watching The Simpsons and Family Guy because apparently, they're part of "the Devil's plan to corrupt God's children". FML

#15370334
368 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42463) - you deserved it (9344)

On 03/18/2011 at 5:40pm - misc - by Jonathan (man) - Denmark (Midtjyllen)

Today, I discovered that the demonic voice that made me nearly piss myself all night, was my sister's Furby she stuck in the closet. FML

#15219004
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36631) - you deserved it (6533)

On 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm - misc - by Spooked (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: