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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 June 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4059
  • Number of comments : 164
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 29 posted

About Xxak907xX : Well.....

Xxak907xX's page activity

Visits<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 3:32am<b>Bibblejomin</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 10:12pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 11:54am<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 7:45pm<b>immaloser95</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 9:56pm<b>KobeLebroJordan</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 8:24pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Allornone</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 7:44am<b>paolino</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:05pm<b>ethan_unoxx</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:08am<b>drpepper2019</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 5:20pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:33pm<b>vivian_rae</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:32pm<b>lillord55</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:34am<b>wopchop12</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 10:10pm<b>liquidbacon</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 11:09am<b>Kitty19</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 6:12pm<b>MrRicko500</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 5:29pm

Xxak907xX's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Xxak907xX's favorite FMLs

Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML

by aprilfools22 / 08/17/2011 at 4:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, a man with a face like a corpse's shoe started talking to me in the long queue at the Post Office. Apparently, his mother invented the banana, and he's first in line for the throne in France if ever Prince Harry dies. And his breath smelled like Satan's ass gas. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2011 at 12:48am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML

by Stevie / 08/16/2011 at 2:52am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

by ifailsobadly / 08/13/2011 at 4:22pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I was having a great time shopping with my gran, until she started complaining about all the foreigners ruining our town, and counting each person who didn't look 100% British. It wouldn't even have been so bad if I wasn't adopted into the family, from Russia. FML

by Foreigner / 08/01/2011 at 11:05am / Jersey / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my brother performing voodoo on a doll with my picture taped to its face. FML

by brebre101 / 07/31/2011 at 5:05am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

by anonymous / 07/28/2011 at 1:39am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was riding on the bus, when I felt a weird sensation on my hair. The person behind me was petting it. FML

by imnotacat / 07/19/2011 at 9:29pm / United States (Washington) / Transportation

Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML

by Bill Harrison / 07/19/2011 at 11:19am / United States / Work

Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

by hatemylife / 07/19/2011 at 2:24am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was at a restaurant with my son when he started to choke on his food. Panicked, I grabbed the closest drink I could reach and made him gulp it down. Only when I received tons of dirty looks from people at other tables did I realize I had given him beer. My son is 8. FML

by stargirl / 07/18/2011 at 8:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, we found out why we were getting notes on our door telling us to "move out or else." As my mom works for the government and we have a direct-TV dish on our roof, our neighbor thinks we were sent to listen to his phone calls and read his mind. We were here before he was. FML

by SonOfaSpy / 07/17/2011 at 9:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous