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Xaviara

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Xaviara
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2412
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Xaviara's favorite FMLs

Today, I went out for a smoke break. A homeless person walks up to me and asks for a cig. As I pull out my pack he says "Oh... Menthols... no I don't smoke that cheap shit". I was called cheap by a hobo. FML

#1187689
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51650) - you deserved it (17085)

On 04/21/2009 at 8:52am - misc - by Kaboom (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML

#820879
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12860) - you deserved it (208027)

On 04/05/2009 at 5:39pm - misc - by funnyguyNOT (man) - United States

Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn't help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML

#532942
331 comments

Today, I was with my grandma waiting in a line. She only speaks Chinese and there was a black man in front of us talking his phone. My grandma tells me that the black man's really loud and annoying. The man finishes and turns and said fluently in Chinese, "What's wrong with loud black men?" FML

#399721
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48593) - you deserved it (27634)

On 03/16/2009 at 10:09pm - misc - by kaichennnxx (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733
513 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48827) - you deserved it (300145)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

#209116
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (218833) - you deserved it (28163)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got my braces on. When we got in the car my dad looked over and said "well at least we dont have to worry about boys for the next two years." FML

#171168
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55849) - you deserved it (3924)

On 03/01/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by jajaja (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a meeting at work. My boss was there as well as her boss, and a few other managers and directors. We started discussing politics in the context of our latest project. I tried to say "erratic election". I almost succeeded. FML

#12756
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20333) - you deserved it (4993)

On 02/07/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by Flubber (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I slipped on a banana peel in a store parking lot as I was getting out of my car. I landed on my ass. The cops that were parking behind me later informed me that I would be able to see the video on youtube. FML

#1741
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19510) - you deserved it (1702)

On 01/19/2009 at 11:49am - misc - by vixenscars - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place, looking drop dead gorgeous. However, she preferred the idea of sleeping, and here I am on my laptop. FML

#41
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38733) - you deserved it (8368)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:56pm - love - by Crawling -



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