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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Xaviara

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Xaviara
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1694
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Xaviara's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to move my girlfriend's car. I failed to notice that the snow packed under the front bumper is actually ice. After a bit of struggle I managed to move the car. The bumper, however, is now a separate entity. FML

#8580764 (72)

I agree, your life sucks (11516) - you deserved it (4208)

On 02/23/2010 at 2:56am - misc - by Good_old_Grim (man) - Latvia (Riga)

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

#8416746 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (19739) - you deserved it (1539)

On 02/18/2010 at 7:44pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while running, I sped up to show off for a cute female runner I'd seen before up ahead. I passed her and not more than a minute later she sprints past me. I couldn't catch up. She not only out ran me, but waited to tell me it was a 'nice try'. FML

#8327951 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (4196) - you deserved it (19617)

On 02/16/2010 at 1:32am - health - by Out Ran - United States (Iowa)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying I was immature for making gay jokes all the time. A few hours later, I got six texts and three calls from guys I didn't know. It turns out, she put my name and number on Craigslist as a gay man seeking a relationship. FML

#8013875 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (7665) - you deserved it (32386)

On 02/08/2010 at 3:21pm - love - by christian9294 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got mauled by a cat named Mr. Sprinkles. FML

#7989901 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (17548) - you deserved it (3758)

On 02/07/2010 at 10:19pm - animals - by zzdug (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my son learned about various animals in school, and how they urinate to mark their territory. Apparently, the entire second floor of my house is now my son's territory. FML

#7981374 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (21699) - you deserved it (1561)

On 02/07/2010 at 7:35pm - kids - by grrrr - United States

Today, my mother and I were driving through Del Taco. Instead of ordering "Macho Diet Coke", she said "Macho Diet Cock". After correcting herself and pulling up to the window, the employee who goes to my high school gave her the drink and his phone number. FML

#7898835 (72)

I agree, your life sucks (16315) - you deserved it (1513)

On 02/05/2010 at 2:52am - misc - by MachoFluster (man) - United States (California)

Today, I dressed up, went over to my boyfriend and told him he could do anything he wanted. He said nothing and walked outside. I figured he'd come back in shortly, but when I looked out the window a few minutes later, he was building a snowman. FML

#7239048 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (20620) - you deserved it (7735)

On 01/09/2010 at 4:20pm - love - by dollybabe (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, a woman pushed me at the bar and told me how much she's always hated me. She was my grade five teacher. FML

#6812281 (61)

I agree, your life sucks (20324) - you deserved it (2171)

On 12/18/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by flurina (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML

#6793560 (65)

I agree, your life sucks (8882) - you deserved it (16246)

On 12/17/2009 at 2:09pm - animals - by ohmy (woman) - Canada

Today, my 5 year old son asked me to explain how he was born. After I told him I had a C-Section, he went to school and told everyone he was born at sea. I found out when the teacher called me. FML

#6643821 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (15051) - you deserved it (4464)

On 12/07/2009 at 12:07am - kids - by proudparent (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a birthday present from my boyfriend's mom. It was ProActiv acne solution. He tried to make me feel better by explaining it's because she wants to be able to include me in family pictures. FML

#6636501 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (27087) - you deserved it (1936)

On 12/06/2009 at 5:13pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML

#6512953 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (28655) - you deserved it (2272)

On 11/29/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by Yoooooo0 (woman) - United States

Today, my car crashed, the only refuge was at a nearby house, of which the inhabitant of the house was a crazy psycho. Now replace "crazy psycho" with "crazy ex-girlfriend who won't help you unless you compose a poem about how much you love her." FML

#6420890 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (21510) - you deserved it (3215)

On 11/23/2009 at 11:40am - love - by worsethanzombies (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, I learned that if you stare at your cat and her eyes suddenly get really big, it means she's going to maul your face. FML

#6355609 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (10669) - you deserved it (19342)

On 11/18/2009 at 4:01pm - animals - by nycplywood (man) - United States (Minnesota)