About Xathanos : Congratulations creeper, welcome to my profile page :)
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, I took my Catholic girlfriend home to meet my family for the first time. My brother thought it would be civil to spend over an hour insulting her religion and explaining in detail the many ways in which "the Force" is superior. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23016) - you deserved it (4595)
On 08/19/2011 at 6:36pm - love - by Jace - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28319) - you deserved it (5110)
On 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - United States
Today, I was riding on my bike when I saw a homeless guy holding a sign saying, "Need money, stranded from Oklahoma." I decided to be nice, and hopped off my bike to give him $2. He took the money, and then jacked my bike. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24744) - you deserved it (7951)
On 07/24/2011 at 12:22am - money - by Joe thomas - United States (Florida)
Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53046) - you deserved it (5468)
On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States
Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29396) - you deserved it (3707)
On 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm - kids - by parenting sucks - United States (New York)
Today, I woke up with bowel problems which have been causing me to violently pass wind every couple of minutes. I have to spend the next two hours sitting an exam in dead silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28398) - you deserved it (2178)
On 06/11/2011 at 4:48am - health - by pleasestop (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42862) - you deserved it (6041)
On 06/10/2011 at 1:01am - work - by MakeMeASandwich (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27904) - you deserved it (5808)
On 06/06/2011 at 3:06am - misc - by dwhite032 - United States (Indiana)
Today, my dad came round to the house. Looking rather pleased with himself he pulled out his phone, grinned, and chucked it over to me. I glanced at the screen to see a naked woman. He smiled and said "I tapped that last night". FML
I agree, your life sucks (36787) - you deserved it (3515)
On 06/03/2011 at 6:17am - intimacy - by peaaaak (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)
Today, I applied for a dental insurance that claims "you cannot be denied". I was denied. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23916) - you deserved it (2258)
On 06/02/2011 at 3:26am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47503) - you deserved it (21370)
On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was cooking, and I took a pot of boiling water to the sink to drain. My pot holder slipped, and the boiling water spilled all over my breasts. Second degree boob burns are bad, but losing half a nipple to potato salad is worse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34676) - you deserved it (3189)
On 03/28/2011 at 2:42am - health - by ouchmytits - United States (Mississippi)
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41199) - you deserved it (21049)
On 03/22/2011 at 1:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, my dad cussed out an individual on the phone because he thought it was a telemarketer. He was my Indian girlfriend's father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32554) - you deserved it (3402)
On 03/19/2011 at 1:37am - misc - by dollarstorepwnr (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got a text just before class that my partner didn't finish their half of our 30 page research paper because "That class is stupid". FML
I agree, your life sucks (29148) - you deserved it (2788)
On 12/15/2010 at 3:11pm - work - by sam - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
