XanderJayNix

Search for a member

Offline (the 09/01/2014 at 7:45pm)

XanderJayNix

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5086
  • Number of comments : 111
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

XanderJayNix's page activity

Visits<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 11:18pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 2:15am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 3:55pm<b>CaroBear</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 12:59am<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 4:41am<b>ThatOneGuyKy</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 11:11pm<b>llamingo</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 5:05pm<b>jessurah</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 10:58am<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 7:32pm<b>Aero_x</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:58am<b>xJo420</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 11:55am<b>Godsofdracos</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 5:09am<b>cerlia</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 3:03am<b>blu8</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 10:57am<b>suckstosuckgirl</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 9:56pm<b>lb0812</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 9:14pm<b>CaptainJudgment</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 6:57am<b>Bmf2k</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 6:01pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 9:55pm

XanderJayNix's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of XanderJayNix's badges

XanderJayNix's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom called me screaming and cussing because she found pot in my room. I come home and my dad says, "I hid some pot in your room and I'm not letting you go to that concert if you rat me out." My dad is apparently a blackmailing 52-year-old stoner. FML

by Joe Lizen / 08/06/2012 at 9:40pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbors are moving. As we were saying our goodbyes, their 12-year-old son approached and thanked me for the times I forgot to shut the blinds and he watched me change. FML

by oops123 / 07/16/2012 at 10:38am / United States / Kids

Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML

by rs / 06/30/2012 at 2:36pm / Egypt / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me I was almost perfect. And the only reason I'm not completely perfect is because I don't like Mountain Dew. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2012 at 1:01am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents at her sister's play. The moment I introduced myself, I realized that her father was my probation officer. FML

by fernie vazquez / 06/10/2012 at 5:16am / United States (California) / Love

Today, a little girl walked up to me at Target and asked me what my name was. I smiled and told her my name was Kristen. She looked at the skirt I was wearing and said, "Kristen, can you wear pants tomorrow?" FML

by whattdafuuukkkk / 06/05/2012 at 7:56am / United States / Work

Today, while I was on stage dancing for a competition dress rehearsal, my top fell off, exposing my breasts. I was really embarrassed, but fortunately no one said anything about it. That is until a kid in the audience came up to me and said, "That was a disappointment." FML

by KenzFell / 06/05/2012 at 3:27am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2012 at 3:02am / United States / Kids

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

by Monsieur-Madame / 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Love

Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML

by Brax / 05/30/2012 at 5:46am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had to get the manager of a grocery store to explain to his employee how coupons work. The employee had refused to accept the coupons I was using, for fear that, "they will be deducted from my paycheck." FML

by brunurb / 05/29/2012 at 7:40am / United States (Massachusetts) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had three things converge that should never be together: my period, hot doctor, and a colonoscopy. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2012 at 3:42am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's always bemoaning my lack of romantic gestures. As thanks, she spent most of the day reading Fifty Shades of Grey, which is basically a blatant plagiarism of Twilight, starring a pair of two-dimensional BDSM freaks. FML

by boblaj / 05/22/2012 at 12:11pm / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Love