Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

XPetrova

Search for a member

XPetrova
  • Town/Country : Moscow, Russian Federation
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 14 March 1991 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 432
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About XPetrova : Hello, привет or hola! Я люблю жизнь!)) Nunca se debe perder la voluntad de vivir, nunca. Yes, I speak Russian, English and Spanish fluently. I am from Russia but I live in Canada. I am studying seismology around the world for the Uni and I love travelling. I have an amazing loyal boyfriend of 3 years from Chile who loves me so very much. I'm so lucky to be with him and everyday I wonder just when he might pop the ultimate question, hmm...

I love classic rock, hard rock and metal. My favourite band is Iron Maiden. I also am a major fan of Judas Priest, Slayer, Megadeth, Deep Purple, ect...

I've been playing electric guitar for 8 years and I can safely say, it's my passion.

It is also important to note, I am a grammar Nazi anx I am an Alchemist.

If you've read this far, congrats, love ya! :) Kisses!

XPetrova's last visitors

mollyjynxjaxsarah1024dovahconnolpallybellenblaasbaasyginezAspireworksskilova4lifezzzhazerdagreekmariepastyglue

XPetrova's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of XPetrova's badges

XPetrova's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the breakfast table when my sister started eating a banana. Before I knew what was happening, I'd somehow popped a boner. I had to wait for her to leave before I could stand up. FML

#20195358
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22592) - you deserved it (15031)

On 12/07/2012 at 5:40pm - intimacy - by bill219 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

#20192329
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20258) - you deserved it (3572)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was slapped across the face by a girl in the waiting room at the dentist's office. She thought I was taking a picture of her breasts with my phone. I was smiling while reading other people's FMLs. FML

#20189568
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34771) - you deserved it (2829)

On 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by karmamaybe - United States (South Dakota)

Today, a shopper approached me at Target and said, "So are you just gonna stand there to look pretty and do nothing around here?" I ignored his comment, until he got so upset that he wanted to speak to my manager. It would have been understandable if I actually worked there. FML

#20177780
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22223) - you deserved it (1568)

On 11/25/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out my girlfriend of 3 years has been cheating on me. When I explained the situation to the "other guy", he exclaimed that I was lying because I was jealous and trying to ruin his relationship. He punched me in the face. FML

#20177730
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24729) - you deserved it (2373)

On 11/25/2012 at 3:09am - love - by king400 - United States (California)

Today, I yet again purposely avoided the 'Health and Fitness' section on pinterest to keep my self-esteem up. FML

#20171929
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6717) - you deserved it (13860)

On 11/21/2012 at 1:20am - health - by fatty - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML

#20171880
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20652) - you deserved it (1918)

On 11/21/2012 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Dead_Fox (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I finally met the girl I've been talking to on phone for a while and found her charming in person as well. There's just one problem: she has more facial hair than I do. FML

#20159578
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16753) - you deserved it (5512)

On 11/11/2012 at 9:16pm - love - by x (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML

#20158993
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23481) - you deserved it (2692)

On 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm - money - by youfuckingslut (man) - United States

Today, the father of my unborn child told me he isn't sure he'll be able to make it to the birth, since there's no guarantee of when it will happen, so he can't schedule time off. This would be understandable if he actually had a job. FML

#20158967
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21003) - you deserved it (5428)

On 11/11/2012 at 1:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I paid a locksmith $100 after I locked myself out of my apartment. All he did was hit it, and it flung open. It wasn't locked, it'd just got stuck. FML

#20153207
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8047) - you deserved it (17719)

On 11/07/2012 at 10:00am - money - by stuck (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried to tell my best friend how wrong she is to be dating a married man, whose wife happens to be pregnant with their first child. Our talk ended with her calling me a "meddling, frigid bitch" and me being told this is why I can't get laid. FML

#20125357
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19475) - you deserved it (1663)

On 10/20/2012 at 2:50pm - misc - by Dillyduzit (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087
397 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63668) - you deserved it (14527)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: