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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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XDplz

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XDplz
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 641
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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XDplz's favorite FMLs

Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML

#5868589 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (32013) - you deserved it (3127)

On 10/17/2009 at 5:08pm - kids - by hamster cookie - Sent from mobile version

Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML

#3232657 (766)

I agree, your life sucks (66987) - you deserved it (13615)

On 06/26/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by ILuvYouSoldiers (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938 (1736)

I agree, your life sucks (363019) - you deserved it (401366)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)