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XDplz

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XDplz
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  • Number of visits : 691
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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XDplz's favorite FMLs

Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML

#5868589
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35201) - you deserved it (3407)

On 10/17/2009 at 5:08pm - kids - by hamster cookie - Sent from mobile version

Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML

#3232657
698 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73695) - you deserved it (15149)

On 06/26/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by ILuvYouSoldiers (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938
1625 comments

I agree, your life sucks (461242) - you deserved it (573020)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)



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