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Wurby's favorite FMLs
Today, I learned that I can work out for over an hour a day, cut my daily calories by almost half, keep careful track of my diet, drink nothing but water, and not lose a pound. But I can sure as hell gain weight after one dinner at a buffet. FML
by foreverafatty / 03/31/2011 at 1:49am / United States (Nevada) / Health
by Kingspin / 03/30/2011 at 12:14pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, I quit my job and sent a mass mail on Facebook that I was moving to a different state with my long time boyfriend. He called me later that night to tell me we aren't moving after all. Now we are both jobless with loads of bills to pay by the end of the month. FML
by Username / 03/23/2011 at 12:16pm / Japan / Work
by Cuzles / 03/23/2011 at 12:11pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I got a call from this drunk man, asking for Celeste. Since I don't know any Celestes, I told him that he had the wrong number. He kept calling for her. Apparently he can't take a hint that she didn't give him her real number, and I get to deal with him. FML
by jeanstein / 03/23/2011 at 10:58am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/23/2011 at 7:50am / United States / Work
by cupcakelady127 / 03/23/2011 at 7:25am / United States / Transportation
Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML
by PFCdavila / 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work
by Kim / 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, I was driving home at night, and got into an accident. Someone had left a toilet in the middle of the road. I hit it. The toilet's fine, but my car now has a toilet-shaped dent in the front. FML
by jballer / 03/22/2011 at 1:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation
Today, I went to work despite having a nasty cold. I didn't call up sick because last week when I called in, my boss said I was being "unprofessional and unacceptable." My boss sent me home with a written warning today, claiming that coming to work sick was "unprofessional and unacceptable." FML
by SickandTired / 03/22/2011 at 12:59pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…