Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

WithS

Search for a member

WithS

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2229
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

WithS's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:41pm

WithS's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

WithS's favorite FMLs

Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML

#8130658
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22878) - you deserved it (4845)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:35pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

#8125309
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22016) - you deserved it (7085)

On 02/11/2010 at 8:33am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML

#4736198
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49422) - you deserved it (5986)

On 08/22/2009 at 1:46pm - intimacy - by doomed (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. As I was leaving his house I hear him shout "Hey! Wait! Sweetie, come back here!". He was talking to his cat who ran out the door behind me. FML

#4733759
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32683) - you deserved it (2867)

On 08/22/2009 at 11:39am - love - by roostergirl (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was watching a movie with my new boyfriend. I got tired so I thought it would be cute to fall asleep on him. He woke me up and said "You got me wet" Thinking it was a joke, I said smoothly, "That's what she said" He replied "No really." I looked down, I'd drooled all over his shirt. FML

#4320217
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16049) - you deserved it (36177)

On 08/05/2009 at 10:23pm - misc - by drooler (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was talking with a close friend (who is a virgin) about why he did not want to have sex with a prostitute. He told me that "It's not nice to know that the girl you are having sex with has slept with half the country", he then added "That is exactly why I would not have sex with you". FML

#4307488
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16570) - you deserved it (59132)

On 08/05/2009 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by unlucky (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I was sitting on the bus next to a hot guy who was texting. I sneaked a peak at his phone to see if he was texting a girl so I could know if he was single. As I looked at his screen, he turned it towards me and typed in caps "STOP BEING A CREEPER." He got out of his seat and off the bus. FML

#4305194
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7852) - you deserved it (78034)

On 08/05/2009 at 9:37am - love - by TextLoser (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at a bar with my friends for my 19th birthday when I saw my dad grinding some chick that was not my mom. I confronted him and told him I was telling mom. He then pointed across the bar to my mom with another man. I just found out my parents are swingers. FML

#4254409
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68602) - you deserved it (5048)

On 08/03/2009 at 12:33pm - intimacy - by myparentsarehoes (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I got fired from work. Why? I finally took a stand for myself and confronted my co-worker of writing things up in my name for herself, and it getting deducted from my check. So she goes to the manager and accuses me of sexual harassment. Everyone applauded. FML

#4252851
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48440) - you deserved it (3411)

On 08/03/2009 at 10:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to visit my girlfriend who lives 20 hours away. Four Red Bulls: $11.50. Gas: $200. Driving halfway across the country to find your girlfriend in bed with another guy? FML

Today, I finally decided to tell my mother, a former Miss North Carolina winner, that I was several weeks pregnant. She immediately burst into tears and hugged me. She kept saying, "Thank god, thank god." At first I was relieved. Then she said, "I thought you were just getting fat." FML

#4244213
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46416) - you deserved it (4228)

On 08/03/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML

#4238671
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51306) - you deserved it (2207)

On 08/02/2009 at 8:59pm - misc - by amburrr (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

#4235904
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62972) - you deserved it (5101)

On 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm - health - by theregoesmyspermcount (man) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: