Warlemming

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Warlemming

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 3 July 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2906
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Warlemming's page activity

Visits<b>3szbkp</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 3:43pm<b>narwhal007</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 1:23am<b>Audrey_Scarlet</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 2:54am<b>SubparAtBest</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 7:00am<b>FoTheWin</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 8:01pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 8:50pm<b>Keeraan</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 3:28am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:09pm

Warlemming's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Warlemming's badges

Warlemming's favorite FMLs

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

by gir / 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

by whyme102008 / 07/13/2011 at 2:32am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 7:35pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2011 at 9:55am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML

by Eve / 06/24/2011 at 6:45am / Ireland (Cork) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear "it's not gonna suck itself." FML

by Username / 06/07/2011 at 2:51am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a hot guy at the laundromat. Wanting an excuse to talk to him, I tossed a pair of my red underwear into his washer. What I didn't realize was that he was washing his whites. Thanks to me, he now has an entire load of pink shirts and boxers. FML

by nicole / 05/27/2011 at 4:52pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, I saw a hot guy at the laundromat. Wanting an excuse to talk to him, I tossed a pair of my red underwear into his washer. What I didn't realize was that he was washing his whites. Thanks to me, he now has an entire load of pink shirts and boxers. FML

by nicole / 05/27/2011 at 4:52pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

by no one / 05/21/2011 at 5:07am / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy

Today, I went bowling with some friends. After a few beers I was showing off spinning the ball around on the tip of my finger. One trip to the ER and two crushed nuts later, I've found that mixing alcohol and heavy shiny balls is not a good idea. FML

by paulwatson93 / 05/17/2011 at 12:28am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my brother slipping into a pair of panties. Specifically, a pair of my panties. FML

by Uhmm... / 05/13/2011 at 7:06pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, while making love to my wife, I let slip her sister's name. I don't think it would calm her down much if I told the truth: I was actually thinking of an ex girlfriend who shares the same name. FML

by scalmon / 05/13/2011 at 1:08pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

by Chels / 05/11/2011 at 1:17am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

by coldwetnose / 05/09/2011 at 2:08am / United States / Intimacy