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WaSiSimiLang

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WaSiSimiLang
  • Town/Country : Now wouldn't you like to know, like to know
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 809
  • Number of comments : 242
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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WaSiSimiLang's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband informed me that he recently slept with a secretary of his to become better at sex for me. I don't know what's worse, the fact that he cheated on me or that he seriously believes that he has a reasonable excuse. FML

#20124966
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20980) - you deserved it (1279)

On 10/20/2012 at 4:49am - love - by Enragedbitch - United States (California)

Today, I was woken up by my teenage son pulling down my shirt and taking pictures of my breasts. FML

#20124963
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30842) - you deserved it (2550)

On 10/20/2012 at 4:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, while driving with my puppy in the passenger seat, he jumped out of the window. FML

#20124915
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18077) - you deserved it (23131)

On 10/20/2012 at 3:16am - animals - by puppylove - United States

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML

#20120541
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19504) - you deserved it (4649)

On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States

Today, the guardian angel charm my grandma gave to me for "safe driving" fell off my sun visor while I was driving. This scared me enough to cause me to swerve into another moving car. So much for safe driving. FML

#20119674
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15177) - you deserved it (5714)

On 10/16/2012 at 2:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

#20119371
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27849) - you deserved it (16778)

On 10/16/2012 at 8:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my dad forced me to take part in a pathetic act of revenge against our neighbors, who keep parking their 4x4 in front of our house. He made me stand watch while he kept trying to slash their tires. An hour later, we were waiting for my mom to bail us out of jail. FML

#20092583
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16488) - you deserved it (6763)

On 09/28/2012 at 6:21pm - misc - by GEE, THANKS DAD (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

#20068529
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21713) - you deserved it (3434)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:03am - kids - by AGeeksWife (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37705) - you deserved it (2942)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my cousin suddenly confided in me that he had tried to commit suicide by overdosing when he was 17. Shocked and not knowing how to respond, I blurted out, "Did it work?" FML

#20068483
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7791) - you deserved it (27863)

On 09/12/2012 at 1:40am - misc - by hahagirl (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to be a gentleman and let an old lady have my seat on the bus. Before I could even get up, she sat on my lap and wouldn't get off. I got an involuntary lap dance from a grandma. FML

Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML

#20067208
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13610) - you deserved it (1705)

On 09/11/2012 at 2:47am - misc - by NotDrunk (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to go down to the county police department to bail out my kids who thought it would be a good idea to try mugging an ice cream truck driver. FML

#20032351
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16532) - you deserved it (3621)

On 08/20/2012 at 6:02pm - kids - by Demetria (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a customer punched me in the face for repeating their order back to them because they thought I was making fun of their speech impediment. I have the same speech impediment. FML

#19982373
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32054) - you deserved it (1713)

On 07/24/2012 at 9:37pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I received a "get well soon" card in the mail, which I found just a little odd, since I was feeling completely fine. Not an hour later, I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. FML

#19981576
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23183) - you deserved it (1916)

On 07/24/2012 at 1:36pm - health - by Anonymous - United States



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