Vittu_Elamani

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Offline (the 08/15/2014 at 8:22pm)

Vittu_Elamani

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1339
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About Vittu_Elamani : "Who are you? How did you get in here?"
"I'm a locksmith...and I'm a locksmith."

Vittu_Elamani's page activity

Visits<b>max367</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 6:25pm<b>mLove395</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 6:58am<b>Tundulinski</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 7:14pm<b>Ari1337</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 5:30pm<b>intheheart</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 5:11pm<b>zombiekitten87</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 11:32pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 04/18/2013 at 3:09am<b>sara122010</b> - the 02/20/2013 at 12:54am<b>lmc94</b> - the 08/19/2012 at 9:24pm<b>starbucksguy</b> - the 05/12/2012 at 7:20am<b>tikimuppet</b> - the 01/19/2012 at 7:59pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:17pm

Vittu_Elamani's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Vittu_Elamani's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2009 at 3:06am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

by BathroomMuch / 12/25/2009 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML

by Anonymous / 12/20/2009 at 3:47am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went shopping with some friends. We were tired from walking around the mall all night, so we decided to sit and relax at a table. I was about to close my eyes when I got smacked on the forehead by an orange falling from the second floor of the mall. FML

by Orangehead / 11/28/2009 at 12:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2009 at 6:44am / United States (Alabama) / Health

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

by APetsPet / 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't. End of discussion. FML

by jentown11 / 09/28/2009 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

by DutchOven / 07/04/2009 at 5:07pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my boyfriend called me and I told him about the AnimeCon I'm attending, and that I wanted to go as Sailor Mars, he told me he had no idea what that was. After being mad for about ten minutes, I realized that I wanted to break up with him over not knowing what Sailor Moon was. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2009 at 12:35am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I pulled up to a stoplight and blew past the car beside me to merge into one lane. About 30 seconds later, I ran out of gas right in front of them. We were on a bridge, and I had to push my car all the way across. FML

by DQB / 05/23/2009 at 10:17pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I ordered more memory and a new hard drive for my computer. I can't remember the last time I was this excited about something. FML

by Sam / 05/20/2009 at 10:17pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting at my college campus, there were good looking girls all around me and I was trying to catch their eye and smile, letting them know I'm available. A butterfly flew by me and I screamed. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML

by Scottrick / 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd probably like to." FML

by peacock_mina19 / 02/10/2009 at 7:08pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous